Who the Fuck Is Natalie Harp?Natalie Harp is an archetype pro-Trump blonde Nazi Barbie who fervently and faithfully follows Donald Trump everywhere.
Known as "the human printer", Natalie's main job is to follow der Führer with a portable printer and print out anything positive that will appease Li'l Donnie's fragile, needy ego.
She's like a fluffer on a porn set.
The ubiquitous nature of her presence to immediately stoke Trump's delusions of grandeur and power is troubling enough.
The depths of her devotion to Donnie are also disturbing.
She's prone to writing letters of lavish praise and fealty to der Führer. Such as this passage:
“I never want to bring you anything but joy. You are all that matters to me. I don’t want to ever let you down. Thank you for being my Guardian and Protector in this Life.”
Seeing such over the top pledges of affection and loyalty set off red flags for the Secret Service who were concerned this woman was batshit crazy and might pose a threat.
Seeing such over the top pledges of affection and loyalty made Donald Trump want to give her a job.
Natalie's back story includes a cancer diagnosis. She beat back cancer through some experimental treatments. Her recovery from cancer led Natalie to offer her undying thanks to one of the following:
- Jesus Christ
- Her doctors
- Donald Trump
Ding! Ding! Ding! #3 is the one!
Apparently in his first term, Trump signed some legislation to give certain cancer patients the right to try to untested drugs and medical procedures.
Natalie Harp credits Donald Trump with her salvation.
We found out about Natalie and her peculiarly close relationship with Donald Trump in the book Regime Change by Maggie Haberstom and Jonathan Swan.
But she gained some renewed attention when Sen. Jon Ossoff named dropped her in a speech recently. "Trump doesn’t want to do the job of President! Instead he wants to build his ballroom and travel with Natalie on their apparently defenseless flying palace."
That sly reference to "travel with Natalie" has caught fire and drawn attention to this slavishly devoted woman who ceaselessly feeds Li'l Donnie all the information he wants to hear.
Speaking of the "apparently defenseless flying palace", Wally the WTF Frog wants to know....
Where the Fuck Is Donald Trump? or Plane Chicken
I've been meaning to comment on the shenanigans involving Trump switching out planes to get out of Turkey.
Trump took his gussied up palatial plane he got from the Qatari government as Air Force One to Europe to attend a NATO summit.
Halfway there he switched over to the classic plane to use as Air Force One to finish the trip. Rumor has it that the new Qatari plane looks pretty but is sorely lacking in all the doo-dads and fiddly bits used to protect the lives of Presidents.
Leaving the summit, Trump is seen entering the O.G. Air Force One but was then spirited off in a catering truck to take another flight out of Turkey. And Air Force One took off without him.
The official spin is there was some credible threat the Iranians had a plan to missile Air Force One out of the sky. Shuffling Li'l Donnie off the plane to another plane did nothing to stop that plot. Which means the Iranians could've still lobbed a rocket at Air Force One anyway and killed everyone on board including Secretary of State of Marco Rubio or maybe even Trump's other blonde Nazi Barbie, propoganda minister Karoline Leavitt.
OK, it seems that Leavitt was still on maternity leave when the incident in Turkey occurred so she wasn't on the decoy plane.
But super loyal super devoted Nazi Barbie Karoline Leavitt resigned as propoganda minister a few days after the decoy plane story broke . She claimed it was to spend more time with her family including her newborn baby and who knows, maybe this perpetually lying syncophant may have been telling the truth for once. Or maybe this Nazi Barbie was incensed she could've been left as target practice by the Iranians and the other Nazi Barbie was not.
In case you're wondering, Natalie Harp did make the cut for the catering truck.
IMHO (and I do stress this is very humble and very much only an opinion) but I think Air Force One is ALWAYS under some kind of threat of attack. So why all the cloak and dagger about this threat?
Trump wants to project that he's some kind of tough guy badass. "I'm so big and strong and such a threat that other people are trying to kill me!"
I don't think whatever threat was made to Air Force One was any more significant than what the Secret Service has to deal with everytime that bird goes up in the sky. It was a chance to play the martyr card without actually being martyred. Trump may be a very old man but he still thinks like a child: it was a chance to play spy and pretend he's some kind of James Bond on a covert mission.
OR... Donald Trump is just a big ol' scaredy cat who ran away from the consequences of his belligerence! And like the gutless coward he is, left others in the path of danger.
Wally the WTF Frog has other things on his mind.
Why the Fuck Is Morale Sinkin' On the Abrabam Lincoln?
For weeks we've been hearing how life is a living hell on the aircraft carrier, the USS Abraham Lincoln. Lack of food, clean water, medicine and working toilets are among the indignities being endured by America's sailors.
No, they're not, says Pete Hegseth.
Yes, they are, says the military newspaper Stars & Stripes.
No, they are not, counters Hegseth and to the publisher and editor of Stars & Stripes, you're fired.
Yes, they are, says the families of those serving on the Abraham Lincoln who have heard from their sons and daughters who are in the middle of this hellhole on the waves.
No, they're not, Hegseth insists.
Preferring to be a perveyor of propoganda than a teller of truth, lest he offend the delusions of der Führer, Hegseth insists that those serving on the Lincoln are only getting the best of the best of what America's finest fighting force can provide blah blah blah you know the drill.
One source of the Lincoln's woes comes from a crucial supply port that Iran bombed a couple of months back and Hegseth didn't tell anyone about that.
He was too busy making sure his "war fighters" have enough testosterone.
Another problem is the USS Abraham Lincoln has been deployed longer than the usual 6 months for U.S. air craft carriers.
The USS Abrahan Lincoln left San Diego in November 2025 and hasn't put into port since then.
One sailor expressed his perspective on the duration of his time at sea: he has not stood on land at all in the year 2026.
When asked about the extended duration of the Lincoln's deployment, Donald Trump said "it hasn't been long enough."
Yes, draft dodging Commander fucking Bone Spurs doesn't think the Lincoln has been deployed long enough.
Meanwhile, the solution to the problems on the Lincoln (which Hegseth insists do not exist) is to replace it with the USS George Washington.
Which means the United States does not have an air craft carrier to defend our interests and assets in the Pacific.
So if China starts some shit towards Taiwan, well, we're fucked.
OK, this post is going on way longer than I planned and Wally the WTF Frog is wondering.
Why the Fuck Is There So Much Shit?
Trump Is Mad At Oman NOW?
Trump threatened to bomb the shit out of Oman. I think Oman is more or less on our side?
Is Trump Gonna Bomb the Bond Market?
Li'l Donnie was asked about about increased volatility in the bond market and what steps he and Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent were taking to address the problem.
Trump said, “We have many types of intervention; that’s one. The ultimate intervention is our military, and if we have to use that, we will.”
Seriously, what the unholy fuck was THAT?- Is he gonna bomb bond traders?
- Are bond traders 2 weeks from having a nuclear bomb?
- Are bond traders blocking the Strait of Hormuz?
I suspect Dementia Don may have... dementia?
Ways For Donnie To Remember His Name
A judge had ordered Donald Trump's name be removed from the Kennedy Center. This was done BUT a tarp covering the front of the building is still there to spare widdle Donnie's hurt feelings.
The Kennedy Center board front loaded with Trump loyalists had a two hour meeting to figure out an end run around that ruling by agreeing to a commemorative plaque citing Donald Trump for saving the iconic venue. Trump called in to the two hour meeting.
Jon Ossoff certainly hit the nail on the head when he said "Trump doesn’t want to do the job of President!" if der Führer has two fucking hours to dedicate to this ego stroking bullshit.
Meanwhile, the U.S. Navy is considering naming a new warship after Donald Trump instead of after Doris Miller as originally agreed.
Doris Miller was a black man (so don't let the name throw you) serving as a mess hall attendant on a battleship in Pearl Harbor who took up arms alongside his ship's captain and fought off the Japanese planes that attacked on December 7th, 1941. Because of segregation in the U.S. military, Miller was not allowed to serve as a sailor and had to settle for working in the mess hall. But that didn't stop him from stepping up and helping in the bloody chaos of that infamous day, tending to the wounded and shooting back at the attacking planes.
Doris Miller was by any definition a hero and deserves the honor of having a ship named after him.
Instead, the Navy might name the ship after that draft dodging Commander fucking Bone Spurs!
You know some Trump lackey in the Pentagon (Hegseth!) saw the name "Doris" and assumed this was some kind of Woke DEI transgender shit or something that needed to be stopped.
So Many Holes In the Ground
Trump is on track to spend $900 million on construction projects at the White House.
- the goddam ballroom nobody wanted or asked for
- a new helipad
- new columns for the front of the White House
Trump took time out of his "busy" schedule to give reporters a tour of all his wonderful construction. He took time to brag about the grass which was put in by Scott's Miracle-Gro who donated to Trump's last campaign.
Trump said he's a big expert on grass and that the grass is "happy".
Well, as long as the U.S. governmen has money to burn, who gives a fuck, am I right?
Yeah, about that....
So Many Holes in the Budget
The U.S Government has run up $40 trillion in debt.
Wally the WTF Frog has questions!
- Hey, wasn't all those slashes and cuts made by Elon Musk and his DOGE goons supposed to fix that?
- Hey, wasn't all those tax breaks to billionaires supposed to fix that?
- Hey, wasn't kicking poor people off food stamps and Medicare supposed to fix that?
- Hey, wasn't all that "revenue" that Trump's tariffs were collecting supposed to fix that?
And finally but really no one really cares about this one but still, let's ask anyway.
Where the Fuck Is Melania?
After showing up with Li'l Donnie at the World Cup Final, Melania Trump was invisible for a month.
She showed up last week at an event called "Fostering the Future", some kind of project to provide help to foster kids to get on with life and go to college. OK, that seems commendable and all but to my knowledge, not a cause that was associated with the alleged "First Lady".
Seeing a bunch of "where the fuck is Melania" posts going up on the internet, it's like someone at the White House realized they needed to prop up Melania in front of a camera for something, anything, what about that foster kids things, hey why not?
Maybe Melania's been busy with her follow up to her Melania movie? Director Brett Ratner posted online, “Here we go again. The saga continues …. can’t wait to share with everyone around the world the next two chapters of MELANIA, THE DOCU SERIES!”
Showing her doing what, exactly?
Like Seinfeld, Melania's docu series will be a show about nothing. But just not as funny.
OK, it might be funnier than the Seinfeld series finale.
What the fuck indeed, Wally!
Whoa that was a LONG post!
And we didn't cover everything!
- Tainted food!
- Rising prices!
- AI run amuck!
- Trump vs. MAGA!
- ICE vs. America!
- Trump vs. Canada!
- Trump vs. Iran!
- It's Joe Biden's fault!
- Running out of missiles!
- Vaccines undermined!
- Patriots Games & the 250 Grand Prix!
- Election interference!
- Dictators are our friends!
- Financial fraud!
Wally the WTF Frog is feeling a bit anxious.Jesus Christ! Will this nightmare ever end?
