Friday, June 30, 2017

Please Just Stop. This Isn't Normal.

Donald Trump has, for good or ill (mostly ill) made the cover of Time magazine. But it's this cover...


...that has a place of honor in the lobbies of several Trump resorts. 

Except... it's a fake. 

There are several tells in the design of the cover that gives it away as a fraud but the biggest flaw is the cover date: March 1, 2009. 

Time did not publish an issue on March 1, 2009. he issue cover dated March 2, 2009 featured Kate Winslet on the cover. 

I guess I could post the Kate Winslet Time cover but I found a better cover shot of Ms. Winslet. 


Oh, good ol' GQ magazine. Don't go changing. Stay classy.  

Now why would a guy who has been on the cover of Time many times for realsies (including his 2016 Man of the Year cover) put a fake cover up for display? 

It is possible Trump didn't realize it was fake. Seeing the gushing accolades with his photo, Donald probably thought, "eh, that sounds about right."  In the world inside his head, he thinks he's loved and admired by most people. 

He's not. But don't tell him that. He thinks everyone regards him with awe and respect so he will not tolerate desent in the ranks. 

Which brings us to...THIS!   

Donald Trump took time out from playing President to address the terrible scourge that is the MSNBC show "Morning Joe". Hosts Joe Scarborough and Mika Brzezinski were described as “psycho” and “crazy”. 


Here’s what MSNBC said about that. “It’s a sad day for America when the president spends his time bullying, lying and spewing petty personal attacks instead of doing his job.” 


But Li’l Donnie was mad and he going to let those meanies on “Morning Joe”  know about it.


I heard poorly rated @Morning_Joe speaks badly of me (don't watch anymore). Then how come low I.Q. Crazy Mika, along with Psycho Joe, came..

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) June 29, 2017


...to Mar-a-Lago 3 nights in a row around New Year's Eve, and insisted on joining me. She was bleeding badly from a face-lift. I said no!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) June 29, 2017


“So THERE! Hmph!” And Li’l Donnie waddled off to pick a fight with his Speak ‘n’ Spell. The cow goes “moo”? FAKE NEWS!


Here’s what some Republicans had to say about that.


Mr. President, your tweet was beneath the office and represents what is wrong with American politics, not the greatness of America.

— Lindsey Graham (@LindseyGrahamSC) June 29, 2017


You know what, Lindsey? Challenge Trump to a duel. Go on! As a courtly Southern gentleman, you would be perfect! When was our last good duel? Hamilton/Burr? It’s been that long?


Please just stop. This isn't normal and it's beneath the dignity of your office.

— Ben Sasse (@BenSasse) June 29, 2017


Anything Trump does is beneath the dignity of something else. Trump was beneath the dignity of The Apprentice. Trump was beneath the dignity of the Miss USA Pageant! Trump’s beneath the dignity of Vince McMahon! Trump is beneath the dignity of urinating Russian hookers! Name anything: Trump is beneath the dignity of whatever it is. 


This has to stop – we all have a job – 3 branches of gov’t and media. We don’t have to get along, but we must show respect and civility.

— Sen. Susan Collins (@SenatorCollins) June 29, 2017


“But I don’t wanna!” Li’l Donnie says petulantly as he kicks his broken Speak ‘n’ Spell. It insisted on lying to him, telling him the cow goes “moo”. FAKE NEWS!


“Respect and civility”? That’s for losers. Wimps and LOSERS!


I don’t know what exactly Joe & Mika said to set Trump off. Hell, I don’t think Trump really knows either. “I heard poorly rated @Morning_Joe speaks badly of me (don't watch anymore).”


You “heard”? He doesn’t watch the show anymore? So Trump got all ticked off about something that came to him second-hand, apparently.  


It seems, America, that we have not been clear enough.


Donald, we hate you. 

All of us… hate you. 

OK, maybe not ALL of us. There are still holdouts in the hinterlands of America’s back roads and back woods. 

Fox & Friends really loves you; Steve Goocy is ready to suck your dick and he’ll push that hot blonde number on the couch aside to do it first. 



Damn it all to hell, look at them with their smug, self-righteous faces. No wonder people who watch Fox News are always angry: the glare from their teeth induces headaches.

And the Republicans? Well, they may hate you but they’re keeping it down because they gave up their souls for power and they don’t wanna think they gave up their souls for nothing.


But everyone else? We hate you! There is nothing that Joe and Mika could’ve said that equals our contempt for you. You think Joe and Mike were mean to you? We, the rest of us trying to cling to some withering vestige of hope and sanity.. we hate you! And we wish (oh we wish really, really hard every day) that you will go away.


Or at the very least, in the words of Ben Sasse: “Please just stop. This isn't normal ." 

Amen, brother! A-frickin'-men.

Thursday, June 29, 2017

A Look At My Heart

Today, a post from the heart.




No, not that kind! This kind!



Yeah, kind weird lookin', I know. 

So Tuesday was the day of my Trans-esophageal Echo cardiogram (TEE). As I noted before, this procedure was in follow up to the diagnosis that I had a stroke back in January. My neurologist wanted to see if there was in anything in my heart (like blood clots) that may have triggered the stroke.


My wife and I arrived at the hospital at 8:30 AM. Hospitals are a far more pleasant experience when they know you’re coming as opposed to showing up in the ER. I was taken to a room where I would be prepped for the procedure. My nurse was named Autumn who was very kind and quite professional. I felt like I was in good hands. I changed into the obligatory hospital gown but I got keep my underwear on. It’s good to hold on to a little bit of dignity. I was set up for an IV and hooked up for monitoring my blood pressure and other vital signs.


The TEE itself was scheduled for 10 AM but we were running a bit ahead of schedule so no sense putting this off: time to stick a camera down my throat.  I was rolled on my bed to room where the TEE would take place.


My throat was sprayed with a substance that must’ve been tested for maximum foulness. The taste was awful and was followed by a brief but intense burning sensation. This spray was to numb my throat to help ease the camera down my esophagus without triggering a gag reflex. Then they sprayed my throat a second time and the experience was not any more bearable.   


Next up, the relax juice was pumped in through the IV and boy, it felt so good. Before I zonked out, I was instructed to roll over t6o my left side. And after that? Nothing.


I vaguely recall the camera cord being slid down the back of my throat but there was no discomfort. The next thing I remember, I awoke back in the prep room. Autumn said the process went very smoothly and the pictures of my heart looked good with no clots visible.


My heart appears healthy which is a bit troubling. I just assumed I would keel over dead of a heart attack at work before I could retire. Maybe I might need to start planning for an alternative future? 


After I dressed, I was rolled out in a wheelchair (I was still a bit wobbly from the meds) to our car and Andrea drove me back home to the Fortress of Ineptitude. Where I slept for most of the afternoon until 8:30. Those were some really good relaxing drugs.


Next up, my neurologist wants my head examined for a blood clots or other anomalies that may have triggered my stroke. Which will be a cat scan or maybe an MRI. So I’ve got that to look forward to. 

_____________________________________________

When they do look at my head, there will be less hair to look through. For the first time in nearly two years, i decided to forego my long haired defiant iconoclast mad scientist/serial killer look and opted for a proper short haircut. 

Below are before and after photos.


OK, that might have been a bit too much to cut off the top.

I had always wanted to have long hair and for some reason a few years back, I let it grow out. I thought it was cool but it was a lot of trouble to maintain. I would start off the day with a nice bouncy coiffure and end the day looking more like a hatchet wielding hitchhiker.  And it no longer interested me so... buh-bye, long hair.  

And that's it for me today. I will be back with some damn thing or another tomorrow. And Saturday's post will look back at last week's Doctor Who episode. 

Until next time remember to be good to one another.   




Wednesday, June 28, 2017

Spinner Rack Flashback: June 1977

Hi there! One of my favorite blogs is Diversions of the Groovy Kind which is dedicated to comic books from the late 1960s through the 1970s or what is referred to in the blog as "the Groovy Age".


The Groovy Age was a time of struggle for the comics industry with rapidly downward spiraling newsstand sales and a really bad feeling that this might be the end of comic books as we knew them.


But this was when I became a serious comics reader so its is an era that has a special interest for me. Recently, Diversion posted some covers from books that went on sale in June 1977. With today as the last Wednesday of June, I thought I would look back to 40 years ago at some of the comics I bought off the ol' spinner racks in my hometown.



All Star Comics starring the Justice Society was one of my favorite books from DC. Writer Paul Levitz was developing a signature style that would serve him well on the even more expansive membership of the Legion of Super Heroes with long term plotting and taking moments to check in on and develop individual characters.


The interior art was by Joe Staton and Bob Layton. Staton would go on to become a definitive artist for Green Lantern while Layton would become best known for his work at Marvel on Iron Man.


By the way, that kick ass cover was penciled by Al Milgrom who would co-create DC's Fitrestorm with writer Gerry Conway. 




The Batman title was a frustrating book at this point. It was written by David V. Reed AKA David Vern who wrote for Batman back in the 1950s for editor Jack Schiff during the Batman meets aliens and fends off marriage minded Batwoman era. In the 1970s, Reed mostly focused on once and done crime stories without super villains.


This issue was a major exception to that. "Where Were You the Night Batman Was Killed?" was a four issue arc as the Gotham City underworld learns that Batman has been killed and tries to sort out which of the competing claims is the one that's true. It's actually a very clever concept; yeah there are plot holes you could drive a Batmobile through but this is a wild story that has Ras A Ghul as the judge and Two Face as the prosecutor while Catwoman, Riddler, Lex Luthor and the Joker take turns making their case that they and not anyone else should have the glory of being known as the person who killed Batman.


(Spoiler: Batman really isn't dead.)


What really mars this story is some rather atrocious art by John Calnan & Tex Blaisdell. Calnan needed a cleaner line from some one like Dick Giordano or Bob Smith, not the darker, sketchier inks of Blaisdell.


Still, you can't beat that fantastic Jim Aparo cover.



I began reading DC Comics just after the big guns had moved away. I missed Neal Adams on Batman, Murphy Anderson paired wit h Curt Swan on Superman and Len wein and Bernie Wrightson on Swamp Thing. But on DC made that last one up to me by releasing a series reprints of the classic Wein/Wrightson stories. My mind was blown that such things were even possible in comics. 


DC had a bit of a cottage industry of reprinting the Wein/Wrightson issues of Swamp Thing in a variety of formats over the years.



Less mind blowing was this issue of The Flash. I recognize the cover; I know I bought this issue but I'll be damned if I can remember what happened in it. Cary Bates was an effective and creative writer for the Flash but the villains he created were mostly forgettable compared to those created by Gardner Fox and John Broome back in the 1960s. In other words, the Molder was not the next Captain Cold or Pied Piper. I believe Irv Novick was the interior penciller. By 1979, Irv was off the Flash and no subsequent artists ever came close to mastering the Flash like Irv Novick. 



Steve Englehart's turn at writing Batman in detective Comics with artists Marshall Rogers is rightfully an iconic run. But it was Steve writing Justice League of America that really captured my young attention. The heroes of the JLA interacted like real people even as they had fantastic adventures. It was a run that benefit from a double length format as Steve had not 17 pages but 32 pages an issue to weave his stories. And it didn't hurt that Dick Dillin, perhaps the best JLA artist ever, was at the drawing board.


So that was a few the comics that a young Dave-El plunked down his change for back in June 1977. 

Tuesday, June 27, 2017

Completely Sensible Murder

So I heard on the radio recently a news item about how the police were investigating the senseless murder of a local man.

"Senseless murder"? 

It's a phrase that ratchets up the tension of a macabre tragedy. But still...

"Senseless murder"?

As opposed to what, sensible murder? 

Well, let's see how that would work.

POLICE INVESTIGATE LOCAL MAN'S
SENSIBLE MURDER 

Police are investigating the murder of a local man, a crime described as a brutal and vicious but nonetheless sensible murder. 

The victim was identified as Clyde Wayne Whitaker Jr, age 39 and police may be hard pressed to narrow down any suspects as the entire community is not surprised by his murder or even saddened to hear of it. 

Jed Greenfield, manager of the area Stop 'n' Go convenience store, described Whitaker as "a complete and total asshole". Greenfield noted that Whitaker frequently stole from his store and would often stagger drunk around the gas pumps, trying to hit on women. "So somebody shot the bastard, huh? Yeah, that seems sensible."  

Whitaker was shot 4 times by a .38 Special hand gun. Bullets struck him in the groin, the stomach and the chest before a fourth and final shot exploded his skull right between his eyes. 

Bessie Nealy, a retired school teacher who lives in the area, commented on Whitaker's murder. "Shot four times? Yeah, that sounds about right." She noted that Whitaker had a habit of urinating in public in front of women and children. "Shooting him dead seems like the sensible thing to do." 

Landscaper Hector Lopez said that Whitaker could be found often defecating on people's lawns. "It was a filthy mess to clean up," Lopez observed, adding "Well, it makes sense someone would shoot him."  

Rev. Matt Thomas approached the crime scene to say a prayer for the victim. However when he was told the victim was Clyde Wayne Whitaker Jr, the pastor stopped, saying, "What? Whitaker? Oh never mind, he's roasting in hell." Rev. Thomas noted Whitaker had a bad habit of pleasuring himself in the church playground. "Really, the only sensible thing would be to shoot him to death." 

The police were already familiar with 
Whitaker before his murder. Officer Janice O'Reilly said Whitaker had a long list of arrests for stealing, indecent exposure and being a public nuisance among other things. Officer O'Reilly commented, "I'm just surprised that no one had murdered the son of a bitch before now. It was such a sensible thing to do."  

When asked if there were any leads, Officer O'Reilly said there was nothing concrete. She did find a smart phone on Whitaker's person with the following texts: 

TERESA: Clyde, you f**king asshole, you've been screwing those whores again!

CLYDE: It's no business of yours.

TERESA: The hell it ain't. I've got V.D. from you, you motherf**king jackass!

CLYDE: Don't pin that on me, you whore!"

TERESA: You calling me a whore?! That does it! I'm going to kill you!

CLYDE: I'd like to see you try! 

TERESA: I'll do more that try! I've got a .38 special and I'm going to plant bullets in your filthy cock, your stomach and your chest and then for good measure, one more between your f**king eyes!

Officer O'Reilly shook her head. "There's not a lot work with there," she noted. "If only we had some clue to the identity of the killer. But sometimes, the trail is cold and there are no solid leads. We'll do what we can but we may never solve the brutal, vicious and completely sensible murder of Clyde Wayne Whitaker Jr."  

Monday, June 26, 2017

Whatever Doesn't Kill Obamacare...

There's an expression that "Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger."  

Me, I tend to be a bit more cynical: "Whatever doesn't kill you isn't trying hard enough."  

When it comes to the Affordable Care Act (ACA) or Obamacare, it's the latter view that seems more applicable. 

The first attempt by the House of Representatives to repeal the ACA failed but it didn't make the ACA unassailable or stronger. The failure of the first effort was attributed to the hard core conservatives who didn't think the repeal effort went far enough. So the repeal and replace bill was stripped down even further, gutting even more benefits and protections. 

Whatever doesn't kill Obamacare isn't trying hard enough. 

So the the measure to kill the ACA was made even more palatable to the hard-line conservatives. then the full bore press was on to pass the damn thing because Donald Trump and the Repuplicans needed a win, even though most of the GOP Congressmen had NO idea what was in it. 

With the win, the repeal and replace effort moved to the Senate where those who supported the ACA hoped the more deliberative body would take a more inclusive approach. Instead Sen. Mitch McConnell doubled down on the House strategy. A group of 13 Senators, all Republican and all men, began working in secret on the Senate's version of repeal and replace. There were no hearings. No input from experts. No debate on the Senate floor. Any and all communications relating to the Senate's health care legislation was restricted to those men on McConnell's committee and the exclusion of everybody else.

Until the bill was released last Thursday and it seems that the Senate has created a bill even more draconian in its cuts than the House version. 

But like the House version, there are objections to the Senate bill.  For not being conservative enough.  

Sen. Ron Johnson joined with Sens. Rand Paul, Ted Cruz and Mike Lee in withholding support because the Senate bill doesn't cut the ACA enough.  

So far, there is only one Republican objection, from Sen. Dean Heller (R-Nev.), that the bill is too conservative, specifically on the point that states that expanded Medicaid under Obamacare are not protected.  

The ACA's expansion of Medicaid is a particular bone of contention for conservatives. Despite the relative popularity of this part of Obamacare and the success that participating states have had with it (including states with Republican governors), expanding Medicaid is so anathema to conservative doctrine, cutting this expansion is a priority to the GOP, even if their constituents don't want them to do that.  


On ABC's "This Week", White House counselor and soulless simulacrum Kellyanne Conway observed that taking Medicaid away from able-bodied adults is no big deal, because they can go out and find jobs that provide health insurance.

Apparently nobody has told Conway that the majority of able-bodied adults on Medicaid already have jobs, low-paying jobs that typically don’t offer insurance. Take away their Medicaid and they won’t be covered. 

Conway also complained, “Why can’t we get a single Democrat to come to the table, to come to the White House to speak to the president or anyone else about trying to improve a system that has not worked for everyone?” 

Remember, the drafting of the Senate bill was done in secret by a group of only Republicans. Democrats have been systematically excluded from a process to draft legislation they don't want. Why would the Democrats want to be on board with repeal of an act they supported? 

"We find the defendant guilty and sentenced to be hanged! If you would be so kind as to bring your own rope, we would be most appreciative."  

And there is zero incentive for the Republicans to change that. As long as they subscribe to the complete orthodoxy of right wing conservatism and they have control of both Houses of Congress and the White House, they have no reason to bring their legislation to even so much as an inch towards the Democrats. 

So for now, whatever doesn't kill Obamacare will just have to try harder.  
____________________________

On the subject of health care, I will be undergoing a "Trans-esophageal Echo cardiogram" which means sticking a camera down my throat to take pictures of my heart as my neurologist tries to determine the origins of my stroke from earlier this year. 

I am not in favor of this course of action. 

More about that later this week.

Until next time, remember to be good to one another. 


Sunday, June 25, 2017

Some Sunday Stuff

Hello. As I write this, it's 5:40 in the frickin' morning here at the Fortress of Ineptitude. Weekday mornings, it's all I can do to drag my butt out of bed by 7:30. But Saturday or Sunday? Up too early and wide awake. 

Last night's Doctor Who episode was very powerful with a pervasive sense of doom. OK, more about that in Satuday's Doctor Who post. 

But seriously, Steven Moffat: Damn!

Meanwhile, mechanical issues here at the Fortress with a not quite up to speed washing machine. So my daughter accompanied me on her first visit to a laundromat. There is something relaxing about a laundromat, with the low hum of washing machines and dryers in concert. I rather missed the experience. 

This particular laundromat is attached to a bar. We found a comfy sofa to sit on while we read. Randie's embarking on her first Stephen King novel, The Shining. Me, I got back to a book I received for Christmas, an oral history of The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. I had gotten about halfway through it but after I had my stroke and broke my arm in January; I had not gotten back to it. I think I may have forgotten I had it even though it is a very enjoyable book that is by turns insightful and funny. 

Speaking of the stroke, my neurologist wants to take a peek at my heart by threading a tiny camera down my throat. he wants to see if there are clues as to what instigated my stroke and I guess try to keep whatever it was from happening again. This is scheduled to done on Tuesday, I can't say I'm looking forward to it. 

Now it's 5:58 AM and NOW I'm feeling sleepy again. So back to bed.  

Until next time, remember to be good to one another.  

Saturday, June 24, 2017

Doctor Who Is NEW!: The Eaters Of Light


Tick tock, goes the clock! The Doctor's running out of time.


Tonight is the first of the last two episodes of Doctor Who Series 10. Steven Moffat's last two parter, his last episodes as head writer, his last season finale.

And likewise for Peter Capaldi who really came into his own this year as the Doctor. I mean, he was good before but this year, he was something special.

After the finale for Series 10, we're still not done with Steve and Peter yet. We'll have the Christmas special where we will truly say good-bye. Oh, that's gonna hurt. 

But before move forward towards the future, we need to sort out the past. What about episode from last Saturday? We'll, I'll get to that right after the break. 



The Eaters Of Light
by Rona Munro

The Doctor and Bill have a difference of opinion regarding the fate of the Ninth Legion of the Imperial Roman army. Bill says they survived; the Doctor says they all died. Well, that’s the beauty of having a time machine as they travel in the TARDIS to the 2nd century in Scotland to sort this out themselves.


Bill goes her own way, looking for live Romans while the Doctor and Nardole go in a different direction looking for dead ones. 


After falling down a hole (for the 2nd week in a row!), Bill finds Roman Legions soldiers hiding from a creature drawn to any light source, killing those in its path. 

Meanwhile, the Doctor and Nardole discover the corpses of the remaining Legion. So Bill found live Romans AND the Doctor found dead ones. I guess you could call that a “win-win”.  

But then, there's... the monster.

The Doctor and Nardole also meet a Pict tribe guarding a cairn. The Doctor enters the cairn, passing into an interdimensional portal. The Pict explains that a warrior goes through the cairn to defeat an "Eater of Light", but with the invading Roman army, she allowed one to escape to fight them. 

Bill leads the surviving legion away from the creature and end up reuniting with the Doctor and Nardole. The Doctor works out a plan to lure the Eater back to the portal during daylight, but it requires someone inside preventing the creature's escape. Which the Doctor figures will be him. But once the creature is trapped, former adversaries the Pict and the Ninth Legion come together to sacrifice themselves to stop the creatures. 

Back in the TARDIS, Missy awaits their return, to the surprise of Bill and Nardole.

“The Eaters of Light” marks the first script for the revived series written by a writer for the classic series. Rona Munro wrote Survival which was a pretty good script for the 7th Doctor but also has the unfortunate distinction of being the last ever episode of the original Doctor Who series. Munro is in fine form here with a cleverly conceived scary monster tied to a piece of arcane history of Scotland and the Roman  Empire. Some good character work; I like that Nardole goes native to bond with the Scottish tribe. And Bill’s sexual orientation comes up in a clever bit; one of the Legion soldiers is super flirting with Bill. She tells him she likes women… and he’s OK with it. This is the 2nd century. But the Legion has a guy who likes men and Bill’s would be suitor has an even more expansive view of human sexuality. (Capt. Jack Harkness should meet this guy.) 

I noted that that the monster was “cleverly conceived” but I’m not sure it was clearly explained. Mostly, I just accepted that the creature was a tentacled alien thing from another dimension that kills people and left it that. The whole “light eating” aspect was not clearly invoked. 

One thing working against the episode is it's placement in the season. Two weeks in a row, we’ve had stories of an invading army and a native population at odds with each other but they need each other to survive.  And two weeks in a row, Bill Potts falls down a hole. 

I have a feeling this episode or Empress of Mars was originally conceived to appear earlier in the season. It seems unlikely that the producers would’ve deliberately put these similarly themed episodes back to back. Also, the level of surprise Bill and Nardole express in finding Missy in the TARDIS seems a bit much as she was just there last week. There’s a quick line from the Doctor reminding them how they got home from Mars but still, Bill and Nardole over react to Missy’s presence.

All in all, a good effort all around. I wouldn’t mind seeing Rona Munro take another turn at a Doctor Who script.  

But next time? The Cybermen from Mondas? Missy on a mission? And the return of John Simm as the Master? Will Bill fall down a hole for the 3rd week in a row?!


“World Enough and Time”, tonight at 9 PM on BBC America.

Friday, June 23, 2017

Time, What Has Become of Me?



Today is Friday.


This post is going up on Friday, June 23, 2017.


It is Friday.


I’m re-emphasizing this information lest I forget and think today is Saturday. Because yesterday, Thursday, I kept thinking it was Friday. It just felt… Friday-ish.


I was working with someone on a project and we needed to stop. I said, “Well, I guess we’ll pick this up on Monday.”


My co-worker looked at me with some confusion. “Do you have the day off tomorrow?”


Now, I was confused. Why would I need to take the day off from work on a Sat—


“Today is… not Friday?”


“It’s Thursday, David.” 


Well, I don’t know about that. It FEELS like FRIDAY.


But alas, he was correct. It was Thursday.


“Well, I guess we’ll pick this up tomorrow morning. Which is Friday. Because today is not Friday. That’s tomorrow.


My co-worker was concerned. “Maybe you should take a day off.”


Nah, that’s just me being me. If you’re thinking it’s a shame getting old and losing one’s mind but no. This has happened before.


I was in college, sophomore year. I had a paper due for my philosophy class. (Yes, I took a philosophy class! Don’t mock me!) It was due on a Wednesday. I was so happy to have this paper done; I felt I had done good work on it and I was turning it in on time. I made my way to the professor’s office where his assistant took my paper. She noted that I was going to get docked 10 points.


“Why,” I asked.


“Because it’s late.”


“No it isn’t; it’s due Wednesday.”


“Yes, it WAS due Wednesday.”


“So how can you say it’s late when I’m here on a…”


I stopped stone cold right there as my stomach sank to my knees.


“It’s… not… Wednesday?”


“Nope! It’s Thursday?” 


“Are you sure?” 


“Yep.”


I slowly began piecing together the clues in my mind. OK, I remembered Monday. Then Tuesday. And then there was that… extra day that got in there somehow. Oh! THAT was Wednesday! Not today.


“DAMMIT!”


My philosophy professor did not deem my paper “A” worthy. More of a “B” which indeed got busted down to a “C”. Okay, I could live with that. But if HAD been a “A” paper marked down to a “B”, I would’ve been wicked pissed off about that.


Day confusion came up a few weeks ago. On Memorial Day, the family had absconded from the Fortress of Ineptitude to spend some time at the pool. While there, Randie noted that she had some homework that was due tomorrow. I was puzzled by this. Why does she have homework due on a Sunday?


For a moment there, I thought it was Saturday. Well, it felt Saturday-ish. Kind of like today.


IT’S FRIDAY, DAMMIT!

And I’m so glad my suffering amuses you.

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