Friday, June 23, 2017

Time, What Has Become of Me?



Today is Friday.


This post is going up on Friday, June 23, 2017.


It is Friday.


I’m re-emphasizing this information lest I forget and think today is Saturday. Because yesterday, Thursday, I kept thinking it was Friday. It just felt… Friday-ish.


I was working with someone on a project and we needed to stop. I said, “Well, I guess we’ll pick this up on Monday.”


My co-worker looked at me with some confusion. “Do you have the day off tomorrow?”


Now, I was confused. Why would I need to take the day off from work on a Sat—


“Today is… not Friday?”


“It’s Thursday, David.” 


Well, I don’t know about that. It FEELS like FRIDAY.


But alas, he was correct. It was Thursday.


“Well, I guess we’ll pick this up tomorrow morning. Which is Friday. Because today is not Friday. That’s tomorrow.


My co-worker was concerned. “Maybe you should take a day off.”


Nah, that’s just me being me. If you’re thinking it’s a shame getting old and losing one’s mind but no. This has happened before.


I was in college, sophomore year. I had a paper due for my philosophy class. (Yes, I took a philosophy class! Don’t mock me!) It was due on a Wednesday. I was so happy to have this paper done; I felt I had done good work on it and I was turning it in on time. I made my way to the professor’s office where his assistant took my paper. She noted that I was going to get docked 10 points.


“Why,” I asked.


“Because it’s late.”


“No it isn’t; it’s due Wednesday.”


“Yes, it WAS due Wednesday.”


“So how can you say it’s late when I’m here on a…”


I stopped stone cold right there as my stomach sank to my knees.


“It’s… not… Wednesday?”


“Nope! It’s Thursday?” 


“Are you sure?” 


“Yep.”


I slowly began piecing together the clues in my mind. OK, I remembered Monday. Then Tuesday. And then there was that… extra day that got in there somehow. Oh! THAT was Wednesday! Not today.


“DAMMIT!”


My philosophy professor did not deem my paper “A” worthy. More of a “B” which indeed got busted down to a “C”. Okay, I could live with that. But if HAD been a “A” paper marked down to a “B”, I would’ve been wicked pissed off about that.


Day confusion came up a few weeks ago. On Memorial Day, the family had absconded from the Fortress of Ineptitude to spend some time at the pool. While there, Randie noted that she had some homework that was due tomorrow. I was puzzled by this. Why does she have homework due on a Sunday?


For a moment there, I thought it was Saturday. Well, it felt Saturday-ish. Kind of like today.


IT’S FRIDAY, DAMMIT!

And I’m so glad my suffering amuses you.

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