Ralph Breaks the Internet

On Sunday, the family ventured forth from the Fortress of Ineptitude to go see Ralph Breaks the Internet, the sequel to 2012’s Wreck-It Ralph where Ralph and Vanellope von Schweetz saved the arcade game Sugar Rush from Turbo's revenge. 

Six years later, Ralph and Vanellope are still friends, working their respective arcade games by day, hanging out in Tappers at night after work.

For Ralph, life is sweet. For him, the predictability of life and its routines are comforting to him, 

For Vanellope, the predictability of life and its routines are  source of frustration. She knows all the ins and outs of Sugar Rush by heart. She wants something new.

To help make his friend happy, Ralph goes into the Sugar Rush game and creates a secret bonus track for her.  Vanellope loves the new track but overriding the player controls causes the steering wheel on the arcade game to get stuck, then break off and then break apart.

Mr. Litwak, the arcade owner, discovers that getting a replacement steering wheel for Sugar Rush is prohibitively expensive so he unplugs the game, leaving Vanellope and her fellow racers homeless.  

Ralph and Vanellope venture onto the Internet via the arcade's newly installed Wi-Fi router in order to obtain a new wheel on eBay. They find one and place a winning bid but whoops! They must pay for it within 24 hours.  Yikes! They’re just arcade game characters! They don’t have money! (No pockets.) 

Ralph and Vanellope hook up with a pop-up advertiser named Spamley who sends them to steal a valuable car from the online game Slaughter Race to earn money.

Ralph and Vanellope steal the car but its owner Shank objects, taking the car back after a high-speed chase throughout Slaughter Race. Shank is impressed with Vanellope's driving skills so she points the pair towards the video sharing site BuzzzTube and its chief algorithm Yesss. Ralph decides to raise money by creating a series of videos that play off popular trends, earning money to buy the wheel and return Vanellope to Sugar Rush.

Ralph's videos become a viral sensation, and Yesss sends her staff into the Internet to spam users with pop-up ad to promote them. Vanellope volunteers for this job and is assigned to a Disney fansite, where she meets the Disney Princesses and gains from them the inspiration to return to Slaughter Race.

Ralph earns enough money to cover the eBay bid which is good but he makes the mistake of reading the video comments which is usually a bad idea.  Adding to Ralph’s blue mood is an overheard conversation between Vanellope and Shank; Vanellope says she wants to leave the arcade.

In a desperate bid to keep Vanellope as a friend and get her to return to the arcade and to Sugar Rush, Ralph turns again to Spamley who sets up a meeting with Double Dan, a virus designer hiding in the dark web. Double Dan gives Ralph a virus that can replicate and broadcast any insecurity it finds. The idea is to slow down Slaughter Race, making it unplayable so Vanellope will want to go back home to the arcade. 

You know this is not a good idea.

Ralph unleashes the virus in Slaughter Race which homes in on Vanellope's insecurity and spreads it, causing the game to crash and nearly killing Ralph and Vanellope in the process.

Ralph admits to Vanellope what he did.  This is not something that Vanellope reacts well to at all, angrily demanding Ralph leave her alone.

At this moment, hurt, alone and confused, Ralph is feeling very insecure.

Guess what virus picks now to slip out of Slaughter Race? 

Suddenly there are countless clones of Ralph destroying the internet, lashing out in pain and confusion. The whole internet is going down. 

An attempt by Ralph, Vanellope and Yesss to lure the clones into an anti-virus traps fails.  After trying to fight off the clones unsuccessfully, Ralph goes for a different tactic other than brute strength.  He lays some truth on the clones, calling out his selfish possessiveness and admits that Vanellope's desire to enter Slaughter Race does not mean that their friendship must end. With his insecurities resolved, the giant Ralph virus monster disintegrates underneath Ralph and drops him! Uh oh! But the Disney Princesses save him from the fall.

The Internet is restored but the happy ending is a little bittersweet as Vanellope does opt to stay in Slaughter Race while Ralph goes back to the arcade without her. Ralph is coming to terms with the new status quo of his life, engaging with  other game characters, while staying in touch with Vanellope through video chats. Ralph and Vanellope are still friends but in different worlds now. 

I gotta admit, the ending hurts. I know first hand the stupidity that ensues when doing desperate things to keep someone you care about from leaving, only to force that person away. That's what Ralph very nearly does to Vanellope: his obsessive need to keep her as his friend almost destroys their friendship. 

The cliche in a movie like this would be to end up with the two friends still side by side. The fact they are not side by side is a surprisingly realistic ending. We fade out with Ralph and Vanellope still friends but they're on different paths now. That happens.  

Some other stuff of note: I am in love with Shank! a drop dead gorgeous car racer with the warm, exotic voice of Gal Gadot! 

I am so in love.

So she's animated!  Big deal!   

The set piece in the middle where Vanellope meets the Disney princesses is very funny. 

Later when the princesses show up to use their various powers to save Ralph like their the Avengers or something is a pretty cool sequence. 

Watch out for Cinderella, though! She will straight up cut you. 

Vanellope and the Disney princesses do have some trouble understanding Merida from Pixar's Brave. But she is from the "other studio".    

Ralph Breaks the Internet is a flurry of sight gags and puns but it has a surprising emotional depth to it. I really enjoyed this movie a lot even it did make me sad. 

Dave-El goes on the internet to search for cure to his sadness.

So she's animated! Big deal!