Submarine Attack!

Being ATTACKED....in a SUBMARINE!!!

It's a thrill packed issue of..... SUBMARINE ATTACK!!!!

A battle ship ATTACKED... by a SUBMARINE!!!

The surprises keep coming in another unexpected issue of.... SUBMARINE ATTACK!!!!

The Nazis are ATTACKING... by SUBMARINE!!!!

Be prepared to be shocked by the latest issue of....

SUBMARINE ATTACK!!!!

There's a SUBMARINE?!?!

And there's an ATTACK?!?! 

Wow! Who saw that coming!!!!  

It's a new issue of.... SUBMARINE ATTACK!!!!

Writer Joe Gill: Hey, Pat! I've got an idea for a story.

Editor Pat Masuli: Whatcha got, Joe?  

Joe: Well, there's this SUBMARINE!  

Pat: And what's happening? 

Joe:The SUBMARINE is travelling underwater and... well, I haven't worked out the rest.

Pat: How about... and this might sound crazy, Joe, so hear me out... what if there is... an ATTACK?!

Joe: Whoa! An ATTACK! Why didn't I think of that? That's some good thinkin' there, Pat! 

See this story come to life in the next astonishing issue of...

SUBMARINE ATTACK!!!!

Memo from the desk of editor Pat Masuli: 

"I can't take it anymore! 

Every month there's a SUBMARINE.... and there's an ATTACK!  Sometimes the SUBMARINE is ATTACKED!! Sometimes the SUBMARINE is ATTACKING!!!  

Every month it's the same damn thing:  

SUBMARINE! ATTACK! ATTACK! SUBMARINE!  SUBMARINE! ATTACK! ATTACK! ATTACK! 

I no longer remember what joy feels like." 

The hits keep on coming with the latest issue of... 

SUBMARINE ATTACK!!!!

Joe Gill: Hi, Pat! I thought I might do something different with this new script. 

Pat Masuli (staring dejectedly at a near empty bottle of whiskey): Does it involve... a SUBMARINE... and an ATTACK of some kind?

Joe (nervously): Er.... ah....   No? 

Pat: Don't lie to me, Joe! 

Joe: OK, there is a SUBMARINE! 

Pat: Damn it! 

Joe: And an ATTACK! Just a teeny one, really. Barely worth mentioning. 

Pat (downs the last of the whiskey): Fuck! 

It's powerful! It's unstoppable!!!! It's the latest issue of... SUBMARINE ATTACK!!!!

SUBMARINE ATTACK!!!!

SUBMARINE ATTACK!!!!

This post has gone to long with SUBMARINE ATTACK!!!!

If you think this post is whack, 

So get off of my back! 

Cause this is the end...

This is the end...

This is the end of....

SUBMARINE ATTACK!!!!

SUBMARINE ATTACK!!!!

This is the end of....

SUBMARINE ATTACK!!!!

We cannot begin to tell you how completely sorry we are for today's post. We will do a better job of making sure Dave-El gets plenty of rest and stays on his meds."