This (Non) Sporting Life: Once More the Super Bowl

So this past Sunday, Andrea and I absconded from the ol' Fortress of Ineptitude to go to her father's house to watch Super Bowl LVIII 

Otherwise known as....

SUPER BOWL 
ELLE
VEE
EYE EYE EYE 

Or Super Bowl 58 if you want to be pedantic about it.

Before the game started, Andra Day sang "Lift Every Voice and Sing" and white supremacist MAGA heads all over America lost their shit over the performance of the so called "Black National Anthem".   

Reba McIntyre sang "The Star Spangled Banner".  Beautiful job she did of it too but the white supremacist MAGA heads all over America didn't hear it 'cause their heads done 'sploded over the black lady singing her black song, blah blah blah.  

The game got started. 

I think.  

The first quarter was a snooze.

What is this, English League Soccer?

I saw Jason Sedeikis in a commercial..

Are we watching an episode of Ted Lasso?

I thought Ted Lasso was supposed to be funny.  

Anyway we trudge our way to half time and Usher's in the house, y'all.

My 86 year old father in law seemed to know a lot about Usher. For example he knew Usher was 45 years old. I looked it up! Yep, dude's 45. 

Usher bursts upon the stage all stylish and radiating energy as he performed  “Caught Up,” “Yeah!,” “U Don’t Have To Call,” “My Boo,” “Love in This Club,” “Let It Burn,” “U Got It Bad,” and more from his 30 year career.  

(Yeah! I did some research! Otherwise I didn't have a clue.)  

Usher was joined on stage Alicia Keys, Lil Jon, Jermaine Dupri, Ludacris, will.i.am and H.E.R. It was a damn fine performance!

Even devoid of clues, I enjoyed the show.  

Apparently Usher also jump started the Taylor Swift's Boyfriend's Football team Kansas City Chiefs who finally started making the game interesting. They pulled ahead and then the team that wasn't them....

(Do some research, Dave-El!) 

The San Francisco Forty Niners pulled ahead. Then the Taylor Swift's Boyfriend's Football team Kansas City Chiefs tied the score and we're into overtime. 

(CBS had scheduled the debut of a new adventure series called Tracker to premier after the Super Bowl. Are we really going to keep the 3 people in America who want to see this waiting?)

Long story made short: in the last seconds of the game the Taylor Swift's Boyfriend's Football team Kansas City Chiefs got past the other team that wasn't them...

(Checking notes: yes, 

...the San Francisco Forty Niners to score the game winning touchdown! 

Congratulations!  The Taylor Swift's Boyfriend's Football team Kansas City Chiefs are Super Bowl champions once more!!!!

Meanwhile, while we were watching the Super Bowl on CBS like a bunch of punks, the really fun game coverage was happening on Nickelodeon where Spongebob Squarepants and Patrick Star were calling the game! 

My favorite commercial during the Super Bowl? The Mountain Dew Baha Blast spot with Aubrey Plaza, "America's sweetheart".

Favorite movie trailer? Gotta go with Deadpool III.

Or Deadpool and Wolverine! Oh hell yeah! 

And that is that for my encounter with Super Bowl LVIII.

Otherwise known as....

SUPER BOWL 
ELLE
VEE
EYE EYE EYE