Feeling Tariffic!

Last week Donald Trump unleashed a shit ton of tariffs against every country in the world (with one notable exception). Why Li'l Donnie did this depends on the hour of the day among the reasons:

• curb illegal immigration
• stop the flood of fentanyl into the United States 
• to bolster manfucturing here at home
• to screw over other countries who have been screwing us
• some vague concept of a plan to usher in a Golden Age of America 
• because he can

Virtually every economist in the world says Trump tariffs are a very, very no good, bad, terrible, horrible idea. 

And it's not just people in the present critical of these tariffs. History shows that tariffs do not work.

Trump loves to quote McKinley has his role model for invoking tariffs. A lot of wealth was accumulated under McKinley.

Yeah, if you were already rich. 

The Trump tariffs were rolled out with a handy dandy chart for how much we were zapping each country in the world for what Li'l Donnie calls "reciprical tariffs".

Why, we are only fucking over countries to the same degree they fuck us over. What's the harm in that? 

Like all things Trump, the chart is a lie.

The column that shows tariffs other countries charge the United States are not actual tariffs but trade imbalances.  

Some trade imbalances exist because countries that are smaller that us obviously cannot buy as much stuff from us.  

Then there is the matter of the penguins.

Including on the tariff list are the Heard and McDonald islands, 2 small outcroppings of land near Antartica where NO humans live.

The islands sole inhabitants are penguins.

One country was NOT on the Trump tariff list: Russia.

Well, Trump is Putin's bitch.

This is going to royally fuck over history students in the future.

Question: In the Trump Tariffs of 2025, who were tariffs NOT assessed against?

A. The French 

B. The British

C. The Russians 

D. Penguins 

Boy are those students going to be surprised to learn the answer is NOT penguins.

 Meanwhile, Wall Street has been in freefall for 2 days and who knows how bad it will be this morning. Investments and retirement plans are being decimated.

Trump spent the weekend playing golf not giving a single goddam fuck that people are worried and scared.

And so are the penguins.