Things are bit cooler outside ye olde Fortress of Ineptitude. A cold front is moving through which brought some snowfall which was supposed to be nothing of consequence. It would look pretty when falling down but not stick.
It stuck. So we've got that going on.
Things are also a bit cooler inside ye olde Fortress of Ineptitude. No, the heating is working fine. But earlier this week, a new refrigerator was brought to the fortress to replace the one that’s been here for 23 years.
About a year ago, the old refrigerator began its slow creep towards death. The ice maker stopped working. Well, that was annoying but we could work round it thanks to the remarkable devices called ice trays.
But then we began to notice other things. Drinks were no longer quite as chilled as they used to be. Items in the freezer did freeze but slower and not as hard as they used to.
It took a while to do something about the old refrigerator. I was still recovering from the consequences of my stroke, fall and broken elbow from the start of the year. But the usual things that paralyze action here in the Fortress were still a factor.
Can we fix the refrigerator?
Should we fix the refrigerator? It is 23 years old for God’s sake!
If we get a new refrigerator, what should we get?
What if we don’t get the best deal on a new refrigerator?
As I’ve noted before, getting anything new for Fortress leads to the inevitable realization that someone else got a better deal.
“Oh yeah! I got that same refrigerator for $200.00 less!”
“Oh yeah! I got that same refrigerator for $200.00 less and it was delivered by waitresses from Hooters!”
“Oh yeah! For the same price, my refrigerator keeps food colder and can travel in time!”
“Oh yeah! For the same price, my refrigerator keeps food colder and provides immediate, mind blowing sexual gratification!”
Oh and in addition, we also needed to replace our washing machine. The tub inside stopped twirling around. Which is important to the clothes cleaning process.
I actually tried to get the washing machine fixed. I was advised that the price for fixing it would come to about $780.00 which is about the price of a new washer AND dryer.
The upside to not having a fully functioning washing machine was I had to go my favorite laundromat, Suds ‘n’ Duds, which is also a bar. My daughter Randie would go with me and mostly enjoyed the experience. Suds ‘n’ Duds is located in a quaint older neighborhood populated by dog loving hipsters. Randie isn’t big on hipsters but she loves dogs.
Still, we ultimately agreed that it would be better if we had our own fully functioning washing machine.
I should point out that our dryer was working just fine by my wife Andrea insisted that we should replace the dryer too. Apparently one cannot buy a new washing machine without getting a new matching dryer at the same time. It is the law! Or maybe in the Bible.
The day we made our purchase from Home Depot from an extremely patient man named Steve, we ame home and I opened the freezer door of our old fridge. The ice bin with the ice maker was full of ice.
After nearly a full year of NOT working, the ice maker kicked out some ice.
Well played, old refrigerator. Well played. But too late.
So this past Wednesday, our new appliances were delivered. The delivery guys were polite and professional. M, I’m scrambling to get a clear path through the clutter that adorns the Fortress of Ineptitude.
As I write this, we haven’t run a load of laundry yet with the new machines (maybe by the time this posts) but the fridge is already bringing us new joy by providing us with cold drinks that are actually cold.
The new fridge is about the same dimensions as the old one but it has a more modern design inside and with LED lights in both the main part and the freezer.
Our new fridge is cool. Literally. It feels good to be part pf the 21st century.