To say it was a rough week here at the Fortress of Ineptitude is a bit of an understatement.
Both Andrea and I took ill with some sort of gastrointestinal affliction.
"Gastrointestinal affliction" is my polite way of saying we were vomiting like a damn fire hose.
You know how the vampires on What We Do In the Shadows, if they so much as take even the smallest nibble of human food, they will expel a literal gusher of vomit afterwards in ridiculous proportion to the amount of food consumed.
So imagine that and you get an idea of the degree of "gastrointestinal affliction" we were experiencing.
In my case, seven times over as many hours.
It was a terrible gamut that left me passed out on the floor at one point.
Oh my God! Are we going to need to call 911 over this?
Even after I awoke, I found it exceedingly difficult to get up off the floor.
Eventually the vomiting part of the gastrointestinal affliction phased out as the damn "d" word took hold of the other end and that went on for days.
After a blur of days of enduring gastrointestinal affliction, Andrea went on Instacart to order supplies because neither one of us was in any damn shape to drive to the store.
Whoever was our InstaCart delivery person must've figured out this household was in the grip of a gastrointestinal affliction with deliveries of soup, crackers, Jell-O, Sprite, ginger ale, Gator Ade, etc etc.
We crawled out of the depths of our distress to return to work on Monday but to be honest, we both could've used another day to truly feel better.
As this posts, I think we have achieved some degree of normalcy or what passes for normal here at the Fortress of Ineptitude.
Andrea is in a tizzy to get things clean in anticipation of a visit from our granddaughter Rosie and her emotional support human, our son Dean.
Me, I'm still perfectly willing to cop to some residual after affects of our gastrointestinal affliction. "I would love to help but I'm... still feeling.... dizzy and... it's getting dark.... I gotta go lie down..."
Remember to be good to one another and I hope you stay free from gastrointestinal affliction.
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