Tuesday TV Touchbase: Wheel of Fortune and The Sandman

Wheel of Fortune has a million dollar wedge that I quite frankly cannot get too excited about. Because the odds of actually winning the million dollars are just so remote.

Here's what's gotta happen to get there.

1. Land on the million dollar wedge which is 1/3 the size of all the other wedges and has bankrupt wedges on either side of it.
2. Guess a letter that is available on the puzzle board.
3. Win that round.
4. Do NOT land on a bankrupt wedge for the rest of the game.
5. Win the whole game to advance to the bonus round.
6. Spin the bonus wheel and land on the wedge where the million dollar envelope has been hidden.
7. Solve the bonus puzzle.

ALL of that happening requires the biggest stroke of luck and is very unlikely to occur.

Until it does.

Last Tuesday, Christina Derevjanik of Stamford, Connecticut cleared all seven of those hurdles and won $1 million! 

Wow! 

In an interview, Derevjanik said, "As soon as the clock started, I just said the answer and for a second, I forgot about the million-dollar wedge. And then Ryan Seacrest opened it, and I was like, 'Oh, my goodness. This is real!'"   

Derevjanik won a total of $1,035,155, becoming only the fourth contestant ever to land the show's $1 million grand prize and the first since Ryan Seacrest took over as host.  

Over the course of the game, Derevjanik collected $35,155 in cash and prizes, including trips to Montana and Tokyo.

For the bonus round, she chose the category "Living Things" and correctly solved the puzzle, "PACK OF COYOTES."

During the show, Derevjanik teased that if she did win a lot of money, she might just quit her job Derevjanik revealed she has not quit her job.  After all, a million dollars doesn't go as far as it used to. 

Meanwhile, ABC is already airing episodes of Celebrity Wheel of Fortune which is Ryan's first season for this edition of the show. Just as it was with Pat Sajak, Ryan seems to find running Wheel with celebrities is like herding cats.

I'm still wondering who these "celebrities" are.

_____________________

I finally finished off The Sandman on Netflix.  

The series could be ponderous and meandering at times but kudos to locking in the puzzle box of insidious machinations that drive Morpheus, Dream of the Endless, to his ultimate and fatal destiny.

Excellent casting of Jacob Anderson (Interview With the Vampire, Doctor Who) as Daniel, the new Dream of the Endless.

If nothing else, the show looks good with fantastic set pieces in Dream's castle and the surrounding realm of the Dreaming, the land of the Faerie and the kingdom of Hell, flashbacks to Victorian England and Ancient Greece, it all looks fantastic, the imagery of the comics brought to extraordinary life.

There was some consternation online about The Sandman ending after only 2 seasons, owing it seems to the controversial transgressions Neil Gaiman reportedly commited against women. Producer Alan Heinberg says the 2 seasons was always the plan and I think those 2 series told the story well enough without needing further exploration.   

The Sandman doesn't quite end at the end. We get a bonus episode based on the limited comic book series Death: The High Cost of Living.  Starring Kirby Howell-Baptiste as Death of the Endless, we spend her day off with a suicidal journalist as he confronts what makes life worth living.  

And that is that for this week's Touchbase.

Next up, the return of Abbott Elementary.  

And the start of Outlander: Blood Of My Blood.

Until next time, remember to be good to one another and try to keep it down in there, would ya? I'm trying to watch TV over here.   

The War Against America

Well, we've got ourselves another good ol' fashioned U.S. government shut down.

The last government shut down occurred during Donald Trump's first administration.

Mr. Super Business Master Negotiator Person does NOT seem to know how to negotiate keeping the government open.

Of course he's not taking any responsibility for it and blaming his arch nemesis.

• He knows 'em! 
• He hates 'em!
• He wishes he could live without 'em!

The Democrats! 

So here's the deal, Sparky.

The problem was the expiration of tax credits for people who get their health insurance through the Affordable Care Act. Without those credits, millions of Americans would see large increases in their premiums resulting in debt or a loss of health insurance.

Democrats told Republicans let's keep those credits in place and we'll sign on to your budget. 

Ironically, a lot of people who rely on the ACA for health insurance come from (you know where this is going, right?) Republican districts, red states. 

Trump's marching orders to the Republican rank & file? Don't bother with the Democrats. No need talking to them. They're the enemy of America. Who cares what they want? 

Well, that's some high level negotiatin' right there, pardner. 

So Republicans closed ranks, said no to doing anything about the ACA tax credits and the damn government shut down.

Republicans are pushing the line that Democrats want to give health care to illegal aliens.  

There is NOTHING in their demands regarding health care that has ANYTHING to do with immigrants, illegal or otherwise. 

And Li'l Donnie has a particular issue with a supposed Democrat demand: "TRANSGENDER FOR EVERYBODY!"

Uh.... what?!

Your guess is as good as mine.

Meanwhile, Trump ordered that furloughed federal workers should set their out of office messages blaming Democrats for why they're not at work.

There is also the not so small matter that furloughed workers may not stay furloughed. Li'l Donnie said the shut down would be great opportunity to just up and FIRE these federal employees.  

Also on Li'l Donnie's evil "to do" list is withholding funding approved before the shut down for infrastructure projects in areas that have Democrat governors, mayors or Senators.  

Yeah, that'll get the Democrats to the table, you sweet talker you.

Now before the government shut down, there was other fuckery to address. 

Let's take a look at the shit show that took place in Quantico VA on Tuesday.

Secretary of Defense...er, excuse me...Secretary of WAR Pete Hegseth summoned all the top ranking generals and admirals from posts all around the country and all over the world to a super duper super secret super important super meeting.  

Hegseth wasn't telling anyone what was up but my guess was this was going to be little more than a power play and photo op. He wanted to show off he had the power to summon generals and admirals and they had to show up and then Hegseth would prance and bellow in front of an American flag about how the WAR department was going to be most awesome at WAR!!!

And I was RIGHT! 

Here's a picture of Pete Hegseth making a calm and rational appeal to the assembled top military brass.

Holy fuck on a stick!  Was Hegseth bombarded with gamma rays? Is he gonna turn into the Hulk? Is this an image that conveys confidence or even competence?

Hegseth spouted off about the warrior ethos and his intention to hold the military to the highest MALE standards!  He seems to think there are seperate male and female standards for combat and NO, there are not.

A lot of women who worked their asses off to earn the right to be on the front line or be fighter jet pilots and what have you were rightfully pissed.  There is ONE set of standards for combat positions and men and women alike have to meet them.  

Hegseth ranted that America's fighting forces would be the absolute most violent, lethal fighting force ever and if America's enemies want to test that, then FAFO.

I almost felt bad for Petey at that moment. He thought he had a killer applause line and that his assembled generals and admirals would greet his declaration with yells and whoops of clamorous agreement.

What Pete Hegseth got was silence.

"FAFO" just laid there on the ground, stinking up the place like so much road kill.

For what Pete was looking at, the front page of the Wall Street Journal provided us this photo.  

Stone faced silence.

Every expression on every face in this photo tells me these military leaders are thinking: "THIS guy is lecturing US on how war works? Really? This guy?" 

Pete's speech also included admonitions against fat people in the military.  No fatties in Pete's troops and his Pentagon. 

Then he introduced Donald Trump. 

Li'l Donnie waddled out to do his usual rambling bullshit.  But he made a pointed reference to tell these assembled military leaders the biggest enemy to America is not overseas but at home.

The enemy within.

Trump suggested the army could be used against Democratic led cities as training grounds for fighting wars.   

Really! Trump wants to use the army against American citizens he disagrees with.

Like Pete, Donald was greeted by silence.

He said they could applaud if they want to.

I guess they didn't want to.   

Here's a video from David Pakman with his assessment of this assembly of military brass and the dumbass fuckery they had to listen to.

By the way, this gathering cost American taxpayers millions of dollars. This from a government that slashed thousands of jobs in the so called name of efficiency spent millions for a goddam pep rally intended to make Pete Hegseth and Donald Trump look tough.

And just made them and our country look like fools.  

Doctor Who Is CLASSIC: The Curse of Peladon

Welcome back to the long awaited return of Doctor Who Is CLASSIC where I post about episodes of Doctor Who from the classic era (1963 to 1989). 

Today's post takes us back to the winter of 1972 featuring Jon Pertwee as the Doctor and Katy Manning as companion Jo Grant. 

It was the show's 9th season during the Doctor's exile on Earth but he makes a foray into space and time to an extraterrestrial world where he must face.... The Curse of Peladon!

The Doctor thinks he's outsmarted the Time Lords and has gotten his TARDIS working again. 

OK, this might get confusing.

• The planet is named Peladon.
• The planet's king is also named Peladon. 
• The planet's favorite pasta dish? Peladon.
• The planet's favorite exercise cycle to work off pounds from their favorite pasta? Peladon. 

The planet Peladon is on the verge of joining the Galactic Federation. 

The king Peladon is big on making this happen but he's got an adviser named Hepesh, a high priest, who is against it. He's a superstitious kind of guy who holds on to power through appeals to religion, magic, nostalgia and the tasty creamy sauce that goes on Peladon pasta. (Yum!) 

Another adviser named Torbis is a bit more forward looking and is backing the king on this matter.

You might think if the planet Peladon is up for joining a big space union thing, it's a world on the cusp of scientific advancement, ready to hook up with a modern universe.

No, it ain't. Peladon is medieval as fuck. Peladon is presented with whatever medieval castle sets the BBC had in storage. Flaming torches light the hallways for crying out loud.

How the hell is a planet like Peladon gonna be part of a space thingy?

What that's what the visiting Federation delegation is going to figure out.  

Alpha Centauri from Alpha Centauri. (Geez! What is with the naming conventions in this episode?) Alpha is big eye ball with a multiple claw arms and a cape. 

Arcturus is an alien crab in a jar on top of some creepy cyperpunk tech.   

Lord Izlyr and Ssorg represent the Ice Warriors of Mars.

And from Earth? The recently arrived Doctor and Jo are assumed to be the Earth delegation and they just roll with it. The Doctor introduces Jo as "Princess Josephine of TARDIS".  Without missing a beat, Jo goes into royal mode.

JO: Doctor, I do not deal through intermediaries. Kindly present us to our royal host.

Peladon the king is suitably impressed. Jo is a strong confident woman who is just sexy cute as hell. 

But as much as "Princess Josephine" is just dripping with allure, the king has other problems. 

Torbis has been killed! 

Hepesh immediately blames the death on the curse of Peladon (the planet, not the king) delivered by the monster known as Peladon Aggredor. 

A variety of suspicious and dangerous shenanigans ensue and the Federation delegates are in a tizzy of a snit that their lives are in danger and maybe Peladon shouldn't be admitted into their clubhouse. 

Exploring tunnels under the palace, the Doctor encounters Aggredor who just a big ol' ball of furry fluff who really likes the Doctor's singing.

But EGAD! 

Hepesh accuses the Doctor of Heresy! Sacrilege! And some other third thing! And the only sentence is DEATH! 

Geez! It's always death.

Jo is pissed off at Peladon the King for not interceding and the King is all "Gee, what can I do?" 

Hey, someone finds a loophole.

The Doctor can answer the charges of heresy, sacrilege and some other third thing with Trial by Wombat! 

<checks notes>

Ahem!

Trial by COMBAT! 

Which of course must end with death so not much of a loophole, huh?  

Hepesh tips his hand and stage a coup against the King. Go back to the OLD ways or DIE! 

But there's more going on that just "Make Peladon Great Again".

Seems old Hepesh was working with Arcturus to keep the planet Peladon out of the Federation and leaving  Peladon's mineral deposits exclusively to Arcturus' planet.   

The Doctor intervenes with Aggedor who kills Hepesh.

Alpha Centari and the Ice Warriors sign off on Peladon joining the Galactic Federation while the Doctor and Jo slip away just as the real Earth delegate shows up.

Hey, it's kind of weird how they showed up on Peladon just all this shit was going down.

The Doctor realizes he may not be as smart as he think he is and the Time Lords sent him to Peladon to sort out this mess.   

Connections to Modern Doctor Who

David Troughton (Patrick's son) who played King Peladon would return to Doctor Who in the modern era as Professor Hobbes in "Midnight".   

Alpha Centauri would appear in the 2017 episode "Empress of Mars". Ysanne Churchman who provided the voice of Alpha in 1972 returned to do the same in 2017.

During production of "The Curse of Peladon", it was noted that Alpha Centauri had a somewhat phallic appearance. So director Lennie Mayne insisted on the addition of a yellow cape to the costume in an attempt to rectify this.

The "Venusian lullaby" the Doctor sung to Aggedor is to the tune of the Christmas carol, "God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen".

"The Curse of Peladon" serves as an allegory to the issue at the time if Britain should join the European Economic Community.   

"The Curse of Peladon" would get a sequel in 1974 with "The Monster of Peladon" but with Sarah Jane Smith as the companion.

Which I will get to eventually in a future edition of Doctor Who Is CLASSIC!

Movie Time: The Hypnotic Eye

It's Movie Time! 

Since it's October and we're counting down to Halloween, the Saturday edition of Movie Time will look at horror films, sinister cinema that we chill your heart, freeze your soul and rend your fragile mind with fear and terror!

Like THIS!

Settle down now. I'm sorry to give you such a fright.

Today's post is about a horror film released in February 1960 called.... The Hypnotic Eye!

This movie stars Jacques Bergerac, Allison Hayes, Merry Anders, Eric "Big Daddy" Nord, and Ferdinand "Fred" Demara.

No, you never heard of ANY of these people.

Neither have I.

Which gives you some idea of what we're dealing with here. 

Beautiful women are doing some bad shit to themselves.

A young woman puts shampoo on her head but instead of lowering her hair into a sink full of water lowers it instead over a lit gas burner setting her hair on fire. And now she's on fire!

Actual scene from the movie! Geez! 

Another woman sets out to apply lotion to her face but what the hell? It's acid! 

There are about a dozen women who have mutilated themselves with NO idea as to why.  

Detective Dave Kennedy puzzles and puzzes until his puzzler is puzzed out and he can't suss what links these women and why they are doing these horrible things to themselves.

Then Dave gets dragged by his girlfriend Marcia Blaine to see the stage show of the famous hypnotist Desmond and his assistant Justine! 

Dave is a major league sceptic of hypnotism. It's all just a con, a scam, a fake out, you see? Don't be a sucker!

But as he watches Demond hynotize a woman into levitating (huh?), Marcia wonders is hypnotism might explain this case Dave is working on. 

Dave consults his psychiatrist friend Dr. Philip Hecht, who is an expert on hypnosis.  He disapproves of the use of hynosis for cheap party tricks because it's unethical and he doen't get invited to those sorts of parties.

Still,  Dr. Phil concedes hypnotism would explain the compulsion of all those women to mutilate themselves and have no memory as to why.  And Dave wonders if Desmond might be the dastardly devil behind it all.

Marcia gets all Nancy Drew and checks on Desmond herself,returning for another show and volunteering for Demond's act. Marcia thinks she's resisted his hypnotic charms.

Such as his post hypnotic suggestion to return to his dressing room after midnight.  She tells Dave and Dr. Phil about Desmond's hypno voodoo and suspects he's the one behind all those women hurting themselves. But more evidence is needed.

Marcia volunteers to keep her date with Desmond while Dave and Dr. Phil follow.  

When Marcia arrives at Desmond's dressing room, she gets hypnotized for real. Uh oh! 

And now we're off... for a night on the town.

Desmond takes Marcia out to a nice restaraunt.

Then off to a beatnik coffee-house to hear poetry.

And they go dancing.

Followed by a return to Marcia's place where Desmond is ready to engage in a little wink-wink, nudge-nudge, say no more, who's your daddy, know what I mean, yeah, yeah?*

*Sex.

Now Dave and Dr. Phil are still following all this and you might wonder how long they're gonna let this play out.  Dr. Phil say he needs more information (as he surreptiously fondles himself) while Dave not knowing that Marcia is hypnotized for real is doing all this shit with Desmond of her own free will. 

God, this guy is making us Daves look bad.  Hey Detective Dave, it's the 1950's (it's 1960! Oh shut up!)! You need to go up there and defend the honor of your woman.

Marcia is saved from the sex. Desmond gets cock blocked by Justine!

Oh I get it! 

Desmond hypnotizes women to fuck them.

Justine uses that hypnotism to fuck with them!

It's Justine who is causing the women to hurt themselves.  

Seems Justine's beautiful visage is but a mask, hiding her disfigurement.

Well, if she can't be beautiful, neither can anyone else! 

Dave and Dr.Phil finally get off their asses to save Marcia from Desmond and Justine but they escape. 

"Obey Desmond!
Your will belongs to Desmond!
Your booty belongs to Desmond!
Desmond gotta have it!"  

The movie wraps up at the theater for another of Desmond's hypnotism shows where Dave and Dr. Phil bust his con wide open. 

Desmond goes all Phantom of the Opera and abducts Marcia. 

There's a chase on the backstage catwalk. There's danger, the threat of death, actual death and more actual death and good Lord, how will this movie end?

With a lecture, that's how.

Seriously, a lecture.  

The movie ends with Dr. Phil telling the audience in the theater (and presumably us watching this movie) to never let themselves be hypnotized except under medical supervision and only with the permission of Major League Baseball.

And so ends The Hypnotic Eye!

Class, read the next chapter in your text book and there will be a test next week.  

The "It's That Person Who Was In That Thing" Department

I commented at the start of this post that The Hypnotic Eye did not star anyone who had heard of. 

Unless you count Allison Hayes (Justine) who was responsible for the Attack of the 50 Foot Woman which you may recall caused the loss of the best spaghetti in town.

Must...DESTROY...
BEST...spaghetti in town!

And Jacques Bergerac (Desmond) was Ginger Rogers ex-husband.  So I guess that's... a thing. 

The Hypnotic Eye is surprising brutal for it's time with it's depiction of women mutilating themselves and the harsh trauma for those who survived.  

The film is burdened with some wooden performances for the lead  roles.  Jesus, Detective Dave is SO slow. 

Credit due to the make up and special effects people. The post mutilated women are terrifying and the effect of the woman with her head on fire is still horrifying and intense.  

Now we must go. But YOU, you will enter into a trance where you will believe this post is the most clever thing you ever read and you will experience a warm glowing reverenance for me, Dave-El and....

A craving for pancakes.

Your Friday Video Link: DOGS and KITTENS and PUPPIES!!!

 

Your Friday Video Link post this week:

DOGS! 

DOGS with KITTENS!!

DOGS with PUPPIES!!!

DOGS with KITTENS AND PUPPIES!!!!

It's too cute! TOOOO CUUUUUUTE!!!!

Happy Anniversary

 

Today is Andrea and I's anniversary.

On this day 31 years ago, Andrea and I got married.

31 years? Seems longer.

Yeah, yeah, I know that sounds like an insult but really...

I do not have a lot of fond memories about life when I was single and I've shoved a lot of that mental stuff into storage and mostly forgotten about it.

Mostly my brain just assumes I've always been married to Andrea.

If you ask Andrea, our wedding was a joyous occasion.  

I felt less sure about the whole "joyousness" because it seems she cried through almost the whole damn thing. 

She says she was overcome with all the joy and beauty and love of the event.

I felt like to me she didn't want to be there. 

I think she was holding out hope that Bob Saget was the one waiting for her at the altar.

I remember she was radiant and beautiful when her father walked her up the aisle.  

I remember to this day what he said to me: "No take backs. She's your problem now."  

Then she started bawling. 

I felt like I might need to tell our guests, "Seriously, I am NOT coercing her into marriage! She's here willingly...I think."  

Well, willingly or not, she's still here. She's stuck by me when no other woman would. 

Love you, Andrea. And happy anniversary.   

Drive Thru Robot Revolution

 

One of my recurring pet peeves involves interactions with ordering food in the drive thru.

 I think there should be a basic understanding of who needs to say what in such communications.

 

“Welcome to ______! How may I help you?” is a basic way to kick off such a conversation.

 

But what I’ve gotten instead is these gems in kick starting a food order in the drive thru.

• “Yeah?”
• “What?”
• "uh...hello?" 

Or just static. I’ll hear a click and I know someone is there but not saying anything.

 

So I go, “Hello?”

 

And then someone responds.

• “Yeah?”
• “What?”
• "uh...hello?" 

Why is this so hard?

 

I actually had this happen once where the person said, “Hold for one moment please.”

 

I replied “OK” and waited.

 

And waited.

 

And waited.

 

So I said “Hello?”

 

And then that person said (and I kid you not) “Are you going to order something?”

 

Huh?

 

I said “You said to hold a moment.”

 

And she replied, “Yeah, I did. And now I’m waiting for your order.” 

 

I drove away.

 

I should’ve gone in to demand to speak to a manager or something cause am I wrong or was that rude?

 

That particular place was a Bojangles and I recently returned reluctantly to that location.

 

Where I talked to a robot.

 

Specifically a female presenting AI chat bot who began the interaction with “Welcome to Bojangles! How may I help you?”

 

I presented my order and the AI interface asked me 3 questions:

• Did I want to add a drink to the order?
• Did I want to add their peach cobbler biscuit?
• Was there anything else?

 A simple “no” to each question and the bot gave me my total.

 

I drove up to the window to pay the people working there and saw the people preparing the food who handed me exactly what I ordered.

 

Now I hate that AI has taken a job away from a human being.

 

But given the frequency of my encounters with human beings who do not seem to understand the basic tenets of human communications and the complete ease of this interaction, it’s hard for me to feel too bad about this. 

By the way, a second visit to that Bojangles went just as smoothly.  

I know there are horror stories of people trying to interact with AI for drive thru and experiencing some epic fails.  

Here's a novelty record from the Dr. Demento show about the peril's of ordering through a drive thru.