Sunday, May 30, 2021

Cinema Sunday: Random Musings about Green Lantern, Spaced Invaders and Other Stuff



Today's Cinema Sunday is not about a particular movie.  Just some random musings on the subject of movies or as the elites say, "film".

I've been seeing commercials for the The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard which is a sequel to The Hitman's Bodyguard which was the subject of the first ever Cinema Sunday posted January 12, 2020. 

The Hitman's Bodyguard was an enjoyable way to pass a Saturday afternoon with Ryan Reynolds and Samuel F. Jackson having a hell of a lot of fun being their most Ryan Reynolds and Samuel F. Jackson selves with a shit ton of snark under a  theme of “stuff blowed up real good”.  

Will I go to see it's sequel in a theater? Probably not. Sorry but my mind has consigned The Hitman's Bodyguard to a movie I saw on TV and my strange warped brain sees it's sequel as something best left for TV. Yes, I know that sounds stupid but no one, least of all me, has ever not accused my brain of being stupid. 

Besides, while I did enjoy The Hitman's Bodyguard, it does not mean I necessarily thought it was a good movie.  Hey, Ryan and Samuel were funny and “stuff blowed up real good”.  Sometimes that's all I need. Do I really need a movie to be good as well? That seems like a lot of pressure. 

Have I ever gone to see a movie knowing it would be bad? Why yes and speaking of Ryan Reynolds,  one of those movies was Green Lantern.  

I really wanted to like this movie. The images of the Green Lantern Corp ripped from the pages of the comics excited my inner teen age fan boy. Hearing Kilowog call someone a "poozer" was a thrill.  

In preparation for this movie, I bought a Green Lantern t-shirt,

I was ready for Green Lantern!

Green Lantern, alas, was not ready for me. 

But even as the Rotten Tomatoes score kept tumbling down, down, down and down, I was still determined by God to see Green Lantern.

I have a Green Lantern t-shirt, damn it! 

By brightest day, by darkest night, this movie was a horrible sight. 

When Andrea and I were first dating, we went to see a movie we knew was going to be bad called Spaced Invaders.  The biggest name in this movie was Doug Barr who was Lee Majors' sidekick on the TV series The Fall Guy. 

In the trailer, one of the invading aliens has a threatening line to say when he encounters a human: "Prepare to die, earth scum!"

The invaders' plans go pear shape which leads to one of the other aliens to lose their shit: "Prepare to die, earth scum! Prepare to die, earth scum! Prepare to die, earth scum! You're gonna get us all killed!" 

Andrea and I decided to to see Spaced Invaders based on that one line even though the damn thing looked cheap as hell and could only afford Doug Barr as their biggest star. 

It was a terrible movie. But sometimes it bubbles up to the surface of our consciousness and Andrea and I will quote it for no damn good reason: "Prepare to die, earth scum! Prepare to die, earth scum! Prepare to die, earth scum! You're gonna get us all killed!" 

OK, I think that is that for this week's Cinema Sunday. Next week we get back to the usual with reviews of movies that are incredibly old and stuff although I do have a post coming up about a movie from 2019. 

Until next time, remember to be good to one another and don't bogart all that popcorn.  





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