U-FOES

I've been asked a few times in my life if I believe in UFOs.

I will answer "yes".

And that will knock people back a moment or two who otherwise think of me as a sane, level headed person and follow up their inquiry with "So you believe in little green men from outer space and stuff like that?" 

No, the existence of "little green men from outer space" is a separate question from the one about UFOs. 

Alien beings are not necessarily little or green or for that matter even men.

But that is another topic. The question right now is do I believe in UFOs. 

Let's start with what UFO literally stands for: Unidentified Flying Object. 

Is there a thing in the sky? Yes, it's an Object! 

Is that thing moving? Yes, it appears to be Flying! 

Do I know what it is? No, it is Unidentified! 

Ergo, Unidentified Flying Object or UFO for short.  

Or as Father Guido Saducci on Saturday Night Life once called them, "U-Foes". 

Anyway there is nothing in that analysis (Object, Flying and Unidentified) that necessarily leads to a conclusion of "little green men (or cat women) from outer space". 

One might argue that if you've exhausted all terrestrial means of identifying a Flying Object that remains unidentified, one might conclude that what remains is the Flying Object is extra-terrestrial. 

I would argue that's not a conclusion, that's a supposition.  Exhausting all terrestrial means of identifying a Flying Object simply means that it remains Unidentified. 

Which seems to be the conclusion of the US Government. 

According to The New York Times,  a forthcoming report says that U.S. intelligence officials found no evidence that dozens of unidentified aerial phenomena documented by Navy pilots are alien spacecraft. 

But...

The report doesn’t explain decades of unusual sightings in American airspace and doesn’t firmly discount the theory that they might be alien in nature. 

All we know is that Objects Flying while Unidentified are not linked to the U.S. military or advanced technology being tested by the American government.

These Objects Flying while Unidentified could be linked to secret, experimental technology being tested by political rivals, such as Russia or China. 

Of course, that's what the US Government wants us to think, right? 

But taken as face value, this report basically can be summed up like this:

• There's shit up there. Flying shit.
• We checked. It ain't our shit. 
• Russia and China are up to secret shit. Could be their shit.
• They won't tell us shit.
• We don't know shit.  

President Barack Obama added fuel to interest in UFOs when he told James Corden that there is “footage and records of objects in the skies that we don’t know exactly what they are.’’

I'm not sure why that statement should be so provocative. Basically Obama said what we already know: there are Objects that Fly which are Unidentified. 

There is no immediate leap that these UFOs are alien. 

Could be from Earth. In the FUTURE! 

Yep, those UFOs could be time machines! 

See, I can make the crazy suppositions too! 

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On the subject of UFOs, here is the opening and closing themes from the 1970s TV seres, UFO.  

It had silver UFOs that 'splode! And purple haired moon babes!

Until next time, remember to be good to one another and keep watching the skies!