Monday, April 1, 2024

Because the GBTUB Tells Me So

Today is April 1st which means it is also April Fool's Day.

So if you weren't following the news last week, you might think this post is an April Fool's joke.

It is not.

Donald Trump is selling Bibles.



Well, it is his favorite book.

And he has many.

He uses them for door stops.   

Like this fucker ever read the Bible. 

Like this fucker ever read a book. 

So the particular Bible that Li'l Donnie is hawking is called the "God Bless The U.S.A. Bible" aka  GBTUB.   

And yes it is connected to Lee Greenwood's dramatic  "America! Fuck Yeah!!" anthem.   

Each GBTUB is available for the low, low price of $59.99 and contains the following: 

  • The King James Version of the Bible.
  • the U.S. Constitution
  • the Bill of Rights
  • the Declaration of Independence
  • the Pledge of Allegiance
  • a handwritten chorus of the famous Greenwood song. 

The website for GBTUB claims that this Bible is "not political".

And that is NOT linked to Trump's presidential campaign

But the sites does proudly proclaim it is the only Bible endorsed by Donald Trump.

Don't know what to get that white Christian nationalist for their birthday? Well, here you go.  

Reactions from Christians have been mixed from "this is blasphemous!" to "this is about dang time!" 

Of course the GBTUB is based around the King James Version of the Bible which many alleged Christians will insist is the holy word of God sent down from heaven and not a version (the word is right there on the cover, "version") of texts written in Greek and Hebrew. Many theologians consider the King James Version to be the worst translation of those original texts.  

But Christians will not let go of their King James Version without a fight. Back when I was going to the church on the regular, we tried to introduce a more modern version of the Lord's Prayer.

For example, instead of "Our Father who art in heaven", it would start "Our Father who is in heaven". Half the congregation would drown out the "IS" with "ART" as if they were defying the devil himself. 

One woman I otherwise respected for her wisdom and intelligence made this argument for "ART" over "IS": "That's how it's supposed to be."

Well, how it's supposed to be is  אבא שלי שבשמיים which is Hebrew for "my father who is in heaven".   

Or "o patéras mou pou eínai ston parádeiso" which is in Greek. 

So anyway, Trump's selling Bibles and that is no April Fools joke. 

But the joke is on us that we have still put up with this lying con man.

And that joke just isn't funny.  


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