Wednesday, June 1, 2022

A Celebration Of Life

I attended Corey Marion's funeral a week ago today.

Or excuse me, "A Celebration Of Life". 

Which is one way to put the "fun" in funeral.

OK, I'm staggering into poorly conceived humor here because...

Well....

It was tough to take.

I've been to several funerals in my time and they pretty much one thing in common.

The guest of honor was dead. 

OK, make that two things in common.

And the  guest of honor was old when they died. 

I mean, older than me. 

I've attended dozens of funerals where the deceased was elderly.  Maybe they could've lived longer if not for disease and the like but most of their days were going to be in the rear view mirror with few accomplishment laying undone ahead of them.

Corey was different. He was my age.  Actually, he was 4 years younger than me. And there was still so much to look forward to. For example, none of this three kids had popped out any grandchildren yet.  

Corey would've made a really cool grandfather. 

These thoughts were uppermost in my mind as the "celebration of life" got underway and I was feeling pretty sad about that.

Remarkably, the "celebration of life" felt pretty much just like that, a celebration, a tribute to all Corey had did with his life and no time for regrets for anything left undone.   

I think I should probably share the story of how Corey helped me.  

I was in a really low point in my life, emotionally and mentally, and my therapist had the wonderful idea that I should make some friends. 

Make them? Like Joel's robot pals from Mystery Science Theater 3000? Or like Doctor Frankenstein?

No, not like that. She suggested I reach out to someone I knew from work or church and suggest going out for coffee or lunch or something.  She asked if I knew anyone I felt comfortable asking to do that? 

My first guess for a victim in "making a friend" was Corey.  We knew each other from church and sang together in the choir. It was in choir where we would chat briefly about nerd stuff. 

My struggle was how I, a straight middle aged married father was suppose to ask another straight middle aged married father out on a date.  

I manage to broach the subject with Corey but I made it clear this was a homework assignment from my therapist so he wouldn't get the wrong idea. 

Corey agreed and we went out to dinner where he introduced me to the concept of craft beers. I am not inclined to drink beer as a matter of course but I discovered the Blue Moon orange peel beer is not that bad.  

I feel guilty that Corey came through for me at that low point in my life but I never did anything in kind for his own challenge when he received his cancer diagnosis.   

As the service progressed, it was clear that while his life was cut too short, Corey lived it well.

Which all that any of us can hope to say at the end.




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