What The Fuck Is Trump Babbling About Now?

Hi! Welcome to a new installment of WHAT THE FUCK IS TRUMP BABBLING ABOUT NOW? 


Today, kids, the secret word is “caravan”.

The big Caravan of People from Honduras, now coming across Mexico and heading to our “Weak Laws” Border, had better be stopped before it gets there. Cash cow NAFTA is in play, as is foreign aid to Honduras and the countries that allow this to happen. Congress MUST ACT NOW!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) April 3, 2018

Whoa, whoa, whoa! What “big Caravan of People from Honduras”? Seriously, what the fuck is Trump babbling about now?

A group of more than 1,000 migrants are on a month-long trek from Central America through Mexico toward the United States. Some will seek refuge in Mexico, others in the United States. The majority are from Honduras.

Apparently, life is shit in Honduras and these migrant have banded together to call attention to that and hopefully make their journey safer. Reports are that these are families with children fleeing a violence and a horrific existence in Honduras. These people are fleeing FROM crime, not perpetrators of crime.

But Trump is in a tizzy that they are on their way. 

Mexico is doing very little, if not NOTHING, at stopping people from flowing into Mexico through their Southern Border, and then into the U.S. They laugh at our dumb immigration laws. They must stop the big drug and people flows, or I will stop their cash cow, NAFTA. NEED WALL!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) April 1, 2018

What the hell is it with Trump’s constant assertion that other people are laughing at us?

“NEED WALL!”? Trump sounds like Frankenstein’s monster: “FIRE BAD!” 

Mexico has tried to keep a lid on Central Americans immigration but apparently there is international law mandating that people be free to leave any country, including their own. So it's unlikely Mexico will stop them from trying to enter the United States. And it’s sure as hell not like they have any incentive to help from that blustering blowhard Trump who insults and threatens Mexico at every possible turn.  

Border Patrol Agents are not allowed to properly do their job at the Border because of ridiculous liberal (Democrat) laws like Catch & Release. Getting more dangerous. “Caravans” coming. Republicans must go to Nuclear Option to pass tough laws NOW. NO MORE DACA DEAL!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) April 1, 2018

“Catch & Release”? Really, what the fuck is Trump babbling about now? What the hell is Catch & Release? 

Well, for starters, there is no such thing. There is no Catch & Release law. It seems Li’l Donnie is referring to a past policy of letting certain immigrants without documentation live in the U.S. while awaiting immigration hearings. It was not something that was done a lot under the Obama administration. And since Li’l Donnie has the attention span of a fruit fly, he forgets that he busted out his box of crayons and signed an executive order a year ago, banning that practice. 

And what the hell is this: “Republicans must go to Nuclear Option”? Most laws passed in the Senate require a 60 vote minimum to pass. It’s hard for Republicans to get things done on a party line vote with a 51 to 49 edge over the Democrats. The Nuclear Option Li’l Donnie is going on about is a procedural move that eliminates the need for the 60 votes and can pass stuff on a simple 51 to 49 majority. Republicans used the Nuclear Option to get Neil Gorsuch on the Supreme Court. Every time Li’l Donnie isn’t getting his way, he demands that the Republicans use the Nuclear Option. Trump is like that boy on The Polar Express who only knew how to do one thing, pull the brake cord to stop the train. Since the Nuclear Option got Neil Gorsuch on the Supreme Court, Trump thinks it should be used all the time. 

These big flows of people are all trying to take advantage of DACA. They want in on the act!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) April 1, 2018

Are you shitting me? What the fuck is Trump babbling about now?

Well, this tells me what I’ve always suspected: Trump has no fucking clue what DACA is. All he knows is it was something that let immigrants stay in the country AND Obama wanted it so it was bad and had to go.

The Obama-era Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA)  program allows children of undocumented immigrants to remain in the U.S. IF

1. they were under 16 when their parents brought them to the U.S.
2. were under 31 in June 2012
3. continuously lived here without legal status since at least June 2007.

 The only people who can currently use or apply for DACA are 700,000 young people currently enrolled thanks to a lower court order that keeps DACA in effect after Trump ended it last year. 

That Trump is so fearful of the “Caravans” coming and he thinks these people can take advantage of DACA? 

What the fuck is Trump babbling about now? 

All I know is it makes me want to join a caravan to Canada if one is heading that way.  

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