Poor Li' Donnie's Birthday

Saturday (June 14th) was Donald Trump's birthday.

Spending $45 million of taxpayer money, Li'l Donnie threw himself a party, a military parade.

He's been bitching and whining for years now how he wants a big spectacular military parade like they do in such bastions of democracy like North Korea and Russia.  

Ostensibly, the parade was described as celebrating the anniversary of the U.S. Army. It should be noted the Navy and the Marine Corps. are also celebrating anniversaries this year but there are no plans for parades for those branches of the service.  

Well, the Navy and Marine anniversaries do not coincide with Li'l Donnie's Birthday so it sucks to be them.  

So on a dreary, grey, rainy Saturday afternoon, Trump watched a dull dreary procession of tanks and jeeps roll by as various soldiers trudged by and dutifully saluted Commander In Chief Bone Spurs.

It was all really sad and pathetic.  Like all things Trumpian, Li'l Donnie's Birthday Military Spectacular over promised and under delivered.  

Even Trump seemed underwhelmed, barely able to feign interest and even seemed to doze off a couple of times.  

Hold on! I have a rebuttal* from Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt: 

"President Donald J Trump, the greatest President ever in the history of the Earth and other planets yet discovered did not 'doze off' during the greatest display of the greatest military force ever assembled thanks only to the strength and benevolence of President Trump.  

President Donald J Trump eyes were closed in fervent and solemn prayer to the one true almighty and powerful Christian God who delivered unto us the only man who can save us from the evils of liberalism and woke ideology! 

The parade, attended by millions on a glorious sunny day was a celebration of a great and fortunate army who get the honor and sacred duty to serve President Donald J Trump, our Lord and Savior! 

Heil, Trump!" 

*I made that up.  (But not by a lot.)  

Meanwhile as a counter point to the smattering of people who showed up for Trump's military parade that no one (except Trump) actually wanted, people all across the country (and even outside the United State) gathered with a specific birthday greeting for the greatest President ever in the history of the Earth and other planets yet discovered: 

"FUCK YOU, DONALD TRUMP!"  

In a series of "NO KINGS!" events, thousands gathered to protest against Trump's bullying autocratic authoritarian bullshit.  

Hey, Li'l Donnie! People don't like you, they hate you and worst of all, we're all laughing at your pathetic shows of alleged strength that only go to show what a weak mewling thin skinned whiny little baby bitch you really are.

Happy birthday, you motherfucker!

 BONUS: check out this video from Bryan Tyler Cohen with his take on the military parade vs. NO KINGS demonstrations.