Tuesday, August 9, 2022

Tuesday TV Touchbase: The Umbrella Academy

 


So today we take a look at the 3rd season of The Umbrella Academy.   

The big bad threat for season three is the Kugelblitz.  It is NOT a giant chocolate covered Bavarian pastry. 

It is the apocalypse (Again? Yes, again!) and it's kinda/sorta the fault of the Umbrella Academy (Again? Yes, again!) and it's kinda/sorta on them to stop it (Again? Yes, again!).  

After their visit to 1963, our erstwhile members of the Umbrella Academy have returned to the present (which I think is 2019?) only to find it's not quite the world they remember.

Reginald Hargreeves has once more assembled a group of young people who were all born on October 1, 1989 from mothers who were earlier that day NOT pregnant and raised them as a family at... The Sparrow Academy.  

Apparently when Reggie met the Umbrella Academy in 1963, he decided he didn't want to deal with this particular group of fuck ups so he gathered a different set of miracle babies. 

Which is one change to the timeline. 

The other change is that in this timeline, the mothers of the Umbrellas died and they were never born. 

Creating a massive temporal paradox that is a big angry ball of fire that occasionally burps or hiccups or some damn thing that erases things and people from existence. 

Say hello to the Kugelblitz. 

It is NOT a pastry. 

It IS the apocalypse.  

I need to take moment to address a significant change to the show in response to Elliot Page coming out as transgender.

I'm going to let Adam Chitwood of The Wrap.com cover this ground.  

 Art imitates life in “The Umbrella Academy” Season 3, as Elliot Page’s character – formerly known as Vanya – comes out as transgender and introduces himself as Viktor in the season’s second episode.

In Season 2, Viktor struck up a relationship with Sissy Cooper (Marin Ireland) who was married to another man. That season ended with Viktor having to leave Sissy and her son Harlan in order to travel back to his time period, but the aftereffects of that relationship are still ringing in Season 3.

“You don’t even notice the box that you’re in, until someone comes along and let’s you out,” she is heard saying.

The implication is that Sissy helps Viktor realize his true self, and he’s now embracing that by living life as Viktor Hargreeves.

Diego calls him "Vanya"   

“It’s, uh, Viktor,” he says. In response, an obviously clueless Diego questions who this Viktor is, so Page’s character replies: “I am. It’s who I’ve always been.”

His declaration is followed by a small pause which prompts him to question whether his identity will be an “issue for anyone”. He is probably remembering all the years his siblings shunned him and never really saw him as a part of their family. 

But the three brothers are quick to put his doubts to rest when they assure him that they are “cool” with the news and are truly happy for him.

Which I hope sums that up well enough. I make mistakes sometimes with this sort of thing and I didn't want to mess that part up. 

Deprived of their home at the Academy, the Umbrellas take up residence in the Hotel Obsidian, a strange and surreal place we will learn was built by Reginald Hargreeves to reach an extra dimensional portal in the sky. This portal links up to a type of mirror universe to the Hotel Oblivion which, much like beer, may be the source of and/or the solution to all of life's problems.    

The Reginald Hargreeves of this timeline seems to be a sorta/kinda of different Reginald Hargreeves.  On one hand, he is as weird and off putting as he ever was; on the other, he seems to be self-aware that he is weird and off putting and seeks to compensate by saying actual kind and supportive things.  

Sadly, it turns out that kind and supportive Reginald Hargreeves is still a manipulative schemer who puts the welfare of even his own family second to his inscrutable objectives.   

As the last remnants of what we might call reality is distilled down to a piece of rock lost in a fiery limbo and the last building standing is the Hotel Obsidian, dysfunctional shit is still happening with the Hargreeves children. 

Allison is on a dark and downward tragectory, almost heading for super villain levels of madness as she cracks over the lost of her child Claire in the present and her husband Ray who she had to leave behind in 1963. She's has a particular mad on at Victor over his protection of Harlan. Harlan's actions kept Allison from being born in this timeline and erased her daughter from history.   

Five (poor bastard still does not rate an actual name) is disturbed by an encounter with his future self, a decrepit one armed man barely kept alive in a metal tube.   

Lila has joined the Umbrella crew and informs Diego she's pregnant with his child. This plays with Diego's head a bit. 

Ben is back but not the chill Umbrella version but the Sparrow version who is a hard hearted prick with a stick up of his ass. As one of only two surviving members of the Sparrows, he kind of falls in with the Umbrellas. 

Klaus is the one who reaches out to this timeline's Reginald Hargreeves who teaches Klaus how to manage his "dying but then getting better powers".  It's a harsh lesson involving throwing a ball for Klaus to catch as he runs into incoming traffic and his repeatedly killed.  He recovers from death and over the course of many, many lethal car collisions, Klaus learns to recover from death faster.  

Luther finds love with a young woman named Sloane, a member of the Sparrow Academy with gravity controlling super powers. They get married, holding a wedding in the waning hours of what is left of life in the universe.   

Sadly, both Luther and Klaus will be brutally betrayed by their father. Well, no hard feelings, it's all just part of the plan. 

Long story made short, the universe gets rebooted but through some strange machinations orchestrated by Reginald at the cost of the lives of the rest of the Umbrellas. Except Allison who has struck some sort of deal with her father won't let it go that far and stops them from being killed. 

The season ends on some happy notes. 

Allison gets both her present day daughter Claire AND her 1963 husband Ray back. Which suggests this is not a restored timeline but yet another variant timeline.

The Umbrellas are alive and well, even with missing body parts restored and Luther is back alive. But his bulky gorilla body is gone and in fact, none of the team seem to have any super powers. And much to Luther's distress, his wife Sloane is nowhere to be found. 

And the last thing we see is a modern city with a sleek tower in the middle from which looking down upon everything is Reginald Hargreeves and a mysterious female companion.   

What is to happen next with The Umbrella Academy? Your guess is good as mine. 

What I need now is a nice warm, gooey Kugelblitz with a cool glass of milk.   

Coming up eventually is my write up of The Orville.  

Until next time, remember to be good to one another and try to keep it down in there, would ya? I'm trying to watch TV over here.  

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