Monday, October 19, 2015

Three Hundred And One Pretty Little Liars and Playboy Bunnies

Yesterday, I'm So Glad My Suffering Amuses You, the blog that is to the internet what Hillary Clinton is to skirts, reached a milestone with post #900.

Wow! 900 times I've come to this blog to post something witty and insightful and 900 times I've posted something best described as "What is this shit?"  

But this post today is also a milestone in the life of this blog, this fortress built to withstand the forces of logic and decency. Today for the first time ever, I'm posting for the 301st time in a calendar year

In 2013 and 2014, I posted 300 times over the course of those respective years. This year I have to date posted something every single damn day and sometimes twice a day. This is my commitment to the readers of this blog, all three of you. And that includes the internet bot from the Ukraine that checks to see if today is the day I give in and post porn. 

Let me take this moment to state emphatically that I will not post porn to this blog. I'm not that kind of a blogger. 

Not for free, I ain't.  

Where was I? Oh, yes! My commitment to my 3 readers (maybe 2) is to be here every day to share with you the scintillating* tales of my most not at all interesting life; to bring to you in some small, small, small, small, very small, incredibly small, small small** way a little joy and wisdom to your wretched existence, little Earth creatures meaningful lives, fellow human beings. 

*Does not know what "scintillating" means.
**Did not use the word "small" enough times. 

The thing is that while I do a lot of goofball things with this blog, I do take this commitment seriously. As such, it is my goal to produce posts for this daily forum that stimulate the mind, touch the heart and maybe, once in a while, elicit a smile or a laugh. I will not rely on cheap tricks to spice up this blog. For example, I pledge with all my heart that I will never posts pictures of beautiful, sexy women for gratuitous purposes and salacious attention seeking. 

And now, here's a photo of the cast of Pretty Little Liars.

I've never actually watched this show. But to my point, that photo is not a gratuitous element to this post. No, it just happens to be the photo of the cast of a show that I felt very strongly sharing the information that I don't watch. Sorry, I'm a firm believer in no-holds barred blogging and this needed to be said. I don't watch Pretty Little Liars

You know, the show with these women on it.

So, once more, I must reiterate: I will not resort to add photos to my posts for purposes of titillation. 

Hey, did you hear Playboy is going to stop doing nude photos in its magazine next year? You know, the magazine owned by the old guy in the picture below. 

Now, of all the pictures I could've posted of Playboy founder Hugh Hefner, why did I pick one with a row of Playboy Bunnies? Is that just gratuitous use of sex appeal? No! If it was, I would've posted this: 

But I'm not going to do that. Because I have integrity. Yes, I am a blogger of integrity.  

Well, that's all I've got for this post, the 301st for 2015. I'll be back for more something or another with a new post tomorrow. Until then, remember to be good to one another. 

Blogger of Integrity 

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