Uber For Dave-El

This past weekend, I took my first Uber. 

I had taken in my car for "routine maintenance" because my car told me to.  

When the "schedule for maintenance" alert comes up on my dashboard, I will not ignore it. 

My experience in my youth with ignoring the "check engine light" taught me that ignoring messages from my car can be very, very expensive. 

Am I a sucker? Does the Toyota corporation and it's affiliated dealerships have me by the balls? Well, yes. 

You can call me a Sheldon Cooper all you want but a CHECK ENGINE LIGHT SHOULD NEVER BE IGNORED!!!

Ahem!  Where was I? Oh, yeah. 

I had taken in my car for "routine maintenance" because my car told me to.  Now I may be weird but I actually kind of enjoy taking in my car for "routine maintenance" because the dealership has a nice waiting area with comfortable chairs, a nice coffee dispenser that dispenses hot chocolate and really good wi-fi. This is really good "me time". I plug in my head phones and chill out with some videos on my phone and some hot chocolate. 

It makes for a very pleasant way to pass an hour. 

One time I was at the dealership and someone I knew from work was there. I was forced to engage in a delightful conversation to pass the time which totally ruined my "me time". 

This time, the dealership had other plans. 

Despite making an appointment online, I arrived to find the service department a bit overwhelmed. Apparently a bunch of people had not bothered make appointments online just decided on a whim to bring their cars in. The failure of a bunch of strangers to plan was going to become my problem as the dealership said it would take a couple of hours to complete my car's routine maintenance.  

Great wi-fi, free hot chocolate and "me time" aside, two hours in a dealership's service waiting area seemed a bit much so I opted to use their free Uber service. 

I got a text that Felix in a dark grey Honda Accord would be there to pick me up.  

Then Felix in a dark grey Honda Accord arrived to pick me up. 

Well, isn't that clever? 

I hopped in the back seat and Felix left the dealership with me not seat belted in. 

1) I do not have a lot of experience with back seats. If I'm not driving, I'm riding shot gun.

2) Every damn car has it's own configuration of how seat belts work. No two cars are the same, especially for back seat belts. 

I am clearly struggling with the seat belt but Felix seems oblivious to my woes. I finally have to say, "Felix, I can't get the seat belt to work." 

Felix pulls off the main road we're on to a side street. Oh good, he's going to stop and tell me how to work the seat belt in his car. 

No, he does not. He's merely driving slowly down a neighborhood street to give me time to figure it out for myself. When I finally realize I've been pulling on the wrong seat belt strap this whole time (yes, I am a dunce and this is why I NEVER IGNORE THE CHECK ENGINE LIGHT), I secure myself and he returns to the main road and we proceed with our journey. 

Felix is listening to the local hip hop station (102 JAMZ). I am not a big fan of the hip and or the hop but he's got the volume low and I'm not offended by anything I'm hearing. I thought it was a little weird Felix didn't ask if I had a preference for music. 

There was no bottled water. I thought Uber drivers had bottled water for passengers. I don't need water so I'm good. 

Felix does scare me a dozen times by following other cars way too closely.  If there is anything I'm more adamant about than NOT  IGNORING THE CHECK ENGINE LIGHT, it's not following other cars too closely.

Felix also drives past my house. 

I didn't think he was going to do that. As we approached my house, Felix slowed down as if to come to a stop in front of my house. Then he inched forward to the next house. 

And that was my first Uber. 

Granted it was not the weird Uber adventure Elizabeth Banks had with Mike O'Brien.  

Three hours later (THREE!) I get a call from Amber at the dealership. 

"Sorry we had a bit of a mishap. And smashed in the front of  your car." 

So I am promised my car will be fixed FOR FREE and they will give me a rental car FOR FREE and they will send an Uber FOR FREE to bring me back to the dealership. 

Well, nice of them to fix my car and give me a rental and an Uber...

I go to my daughter's room. 

"Randie, can you give me a ride?" 

I get back to the dealership to get my free rental car which takes way longer than it should because some dummy forgot to have his current insurance card in his wallet. (Spoiler: that dummy was me.) 

All of this because I will NOT IGNORE THE CHECK ENGINE LIGHT. 

Amber escorts me to my rental car which is a dark grey version of my Camry. 

"It's just like your car except the front end's not smashed in." 

Amber is such a delight. 

And no, it's not just like my car.  When I reached out to push the start button, my button pushing finger only found dashboard. 

I had to sheepishly go back to Amber and ask how to start this car. 

She points on the button on the fob which causes the key to pop out of the fob. I have to put a key in the ignition. 

And I'm so glad my suffering amuses you.