So...
What follows is a script of what I imagine the first minutes of the 13th Doctor's first adventure might be like.
____________________________________
SCENE OPENS
13th Doctor falling through the sky, her flailing body hurtling through wisps of clouds. The ground below is still far away. But it's getting closer.
VO: Peter Capaldi’s
Voice: Hello! I’m the Doctor but…. Hold on! Why do I
still have the Scottish voice in my head? Oh right! Post regenerative cognitive
disassociation! Inner voice not synched up to the outer voice yet. OK, before I
fell out of the TARDIS, I said….something. Something… brilliant?
Flashback: 10th
Doctor:
“Oh, that’s brilliant!”
Back
to the 13th Doctor falling through the sky.
VO: David Tennant’s
Voice: Hello! I’m the Doctor…No! Wait that’s not it!
Flashback: 5th
Doctor:
“Yes, that’s brilliant!”
Flashback: 7th
Doctor:
“Quite brilliant!”
Flashback: 9th
Doctor:
“You were brilliant!”
Back
to the 13th Doctor falling through the sky.
VO: Matt Smith’s
Voice: Blimey! I’ve said “brilliant” a lot!
Flashback: 4th
Doctor:
“Would like to have a jelly baby?”
Back
to the 13th Doctor falling through the sky.
VO: back to Peter
Capaldi’s Voice: Now, that’s not helpful at all! C’mon,
Doctor! Think!
Flashback: 13th
Doctor:
“Oh, brilliant!”
Back
to the 13th Doctor falling through the sky.
VO: back to Peter
Capaldi’s Voice: Bingo! Not a lot to work with but……
Flashback: 13th
Doctor:
“Oh, brilliant!”
Back
to the 13th Doctor falling through the sky.
VO: Jodie Whitaker’s
Voice: Me, me, me, me, me, me, me! Hold on….
Flashback: 13th
Doctor:
“Oh, brilliant!”
Back
to the 13th Doctor falling through the sky.
VO: Jodie Whitaker’s
Voice: Hello! I’m the Doctor but….
The
13th Doctor plummets through a cloud into clear sky and the ground
is coming up fast now.
VO: Jodie Whitaker’s
Voice: But not for very much longer! Oh, this is
going to hurt! This is going to hurt….
The
Doctor slams into the ground in a blur of motion, the impact sending a spray of
dirt and grass as we…
Fade
To Black
FADE IN.
Against a murky purple sky of twilight, three people are running urgently. In the dim light, we see the three include an older man, a young woman and another man about the same age as the woman.
Against a murky purple sky of twilight, three people are running urgently. In the dim light, we see the three include an older man, a young woman and another man about the same age as the woman.
Graham: Bloody hell! Did you ever see the like?
Yasmin: They… they just fell… out of the sky.
Ryan: Yasmin… you better
hold back. Whoever hit the ground, hit it pretty hard….
Yasmin: Ryan, I don’t need you getting all protective….
Graham: Whoever he is….
Ryan: …or she.
Yasmin: They!
Graham: Bloody pronouns! Anyway, that person is going
to be…
A
low groan can be heard from the ground.
Graham: ….dead?
Yasmin: Oh my God! They’re alive?
Ryan: What the…?
We
see on the ground a body dressed in a tattered black suit, a body that can be
charitably described as mangled, arms and legs bent in odd directions. The body
twitches slightly and groans.
Graham: Dear Lord! This… this is impossible.
Ryan: Blimey! We need to
call… someone?
Yasmin: Someone?
Ryan: I don’t know. An ambulance.
Graham: Yes! That seems… reasonable. We should call…
The Doctor: Bonff boffer.
Graham: …an ambulance? What?
The Doctor: Don’t bother. Hold on… just a bit.
Yasmin: Oh my!
Ryan: What in the world?
Yasmin and Ryan approach the Doctor.
Yasmin: Let Ryan and I help you.
The Doctor: No! Stay back. I've got this....
The Doctor groans, unable to move.
Ryan: I don't think you do.
The Doctor: No! Urrrggh!! I've got....
The Doctor continue to grunt, straining, unable to move.
The Doctor: I've... I've... I.... ugh!
The Doctor sighs.
The Doctor: OK, maybe a little help.
Yasmin and Ryan gently helps the Doctor to a sitting position.
Graham: Careful, kids!
Yasmin: I think we've got this.
The Doctor: Oh, that was fun. Up and at them!
Reaching under her arms, Yasmin and Ryan bring the Doctor to a rather unstable, wobbly standing position.
Ryan: Oh, looks like your jacket is on backward...
Yasmin: Oh, my Lord! It's not her jacket, Ryan!
Graham: Good God!
Ryan: Bloody hell, Yasmin! You're...
The Doctor in a jerky motion like a broken marionette staggers on her feet. Her legs are bent inwards, her left arm dangles limply by her side and there’s something not quite right about her head.
Yasmin and Ryan approach the Doctor.
Yasmin: Let Ryan and I help you.
The Doctor: No! Stay back. I've got this....
The Doctor groans, unable to move.
Ryan: I don't think you do.
The Doctor: No! Urrrggh!! I've got....
The Doctor continue to grunt, straining, unable to move.
The Doctor: I've... I've... I.... ugh!
The Doctor sighs.
The Doctor: OK, maybe a little help.
Yasmin and Ryan gently helps the Doctor to a sitting position.
Graham: Careful, kids!
Yasmin: I think we've got this.
The Doctor: Oh, that was fun. Up and at them!
Reaching under her arms, Yasmin and Ryan bring the Doctor to a rather unstable, wobbly standing position.
Ryan: Oh, looks like your jacket is on backward...
Yasmin: Oh, my Lord! It's not her jacket, Ryan!
Graham: Good God!
Ryan: Bloody hell, Yasmin! You're...
The Doctor in a jerky motion like a broken marionette staggers on her feet. Her legs are bent inwards, her left arm dangles limply by her side and there’s something not quite right about her head.
The Doctor: I just need… just need… a moment to catch my….
The Doctor: Wait! Hold on.
The
Doctor looks behind her.
The Doctor faces Graham, Yasmin & Ryan
again, then smiles broadly and begins laughing.
The Doctor: Ha! Ha! Ha! It’s me head!
Ryan: Your head?
The Doctor: Me heads is on backwards! Backwards!
Wow! Oh my! What a day this has been!
The
Doctor stops laughing and sighs.
The Doctor: What a day.
Ryan: Who the hell are
you?
Graham: Ryan!
The Doctor: No, that’s a fair question. I am the
Doctor.
The
Doctor smiles and laughs at this.
The Doctor: Yes, I am the Doctor.
Ryan: The Doctor?
Yasmin: Doctor… who?
The Doctor: Ha! Wait! You, say that again!
Yasmin: Doctor… who?
The Doctor: Oh, I never get tired of that.
Yasmin: Seriously! Doctor… who?
The Doctor: Just… the Doctor! And I must take heed of an
old and wise saying: Physician, heal thyself! And boy, am I in need of some
healing. Left arm’s just… dangling there. My legs are bent inward. I’ve definitely
got some compression in the lower spinal column going on. Oh! And my head is
on backward!
Graham: So we should… get you to hospital.
The Doctor: No, I’ve got this. Thankfully, I’m still
within the first 15 hours of my regeneration cycle so…
The
Doctor’s left arm begins to glow.
Yasmin: Oh my God! You’re glowing?
The Doctor: OK, let’s knit that elbow back into shape and….
The
Doctor extends her now fully functioning left arm.
The Doctor: And SNAP!
Ryan: Your arm? It works
now?
The Doctor: Oh, I’m just getting started!
The
glow forms around her legs as the Doctor does a bit of a dance as her legs move
back into the right directions. Then her left hand glows as she touches her
lower back.
The Doctor: Lower spinal column
is GOOD! And now… for the big finish….
The
glow forms around her head as she turns around with a flourish.
The Doctor: YES! Result! Head’s on straight!
Briskly
and joyfully, the Doctor approaches Graham, Yasmin and Ryan and begins
energetically shaking their hands.
The Doctor: Thank you for being here! It always good to have
company for this sort of thing.
Graham: Yes, my name is Graham and this is
Yasmin: I’m Yasmin
Ryan: …and I’m Ryan. And you
are…?
The Doctor: The Doctor.
Yasmin: Doctor… who?
The Doctor: Yasmin, we’ve done that bit. I’m assuming…
this is Earth?
Ryan: This is Earth?
The Doctor: Well, I was hoping you would know, Ryan.
Yasmin: This is Earth.
Graham: Are you… an
alien?
The Doctor: Well, Graham, that depends on your
perspective but I suppose I…. wait! What year is this?
Ryan: What year is this?
The Doctor: Oh, Ryan, you poor thing. Hold on.
The
Doctor sticks out her tongue, then makes a face like she tasted something bad.
The Doctor: Yuck! 2018.
The
Doctor stops for a moment, looks around her.
Yasmin: Doctor? Are you….
The Doctor: Did anything… else… fall down… with me?
Graham: Anything else… like
what?
The Doctor: Like a blue… box?
Ryan: No.
The Doctor: Are you sure, Ryan? You seem uncertain about
the planet and the year.
Yasmin: No, nothing else fell
down with you.
The Doctor: OK. That could be… trouble. Well….
The
Doctor begins to stride away from the others with a sense of purpose and
confidence.
Yasmin: Doctor? Where are you
going?
The
Doctor stops and looks up at the star dappled sky.
The Doctor: There’s a universe out there that’s going to
get it wrong without me. I can’t stay
here. I have work to do.
Graham: What sort of… work?
The Doctor: I have no idea. Could be easy or hard. Could
be dangerous.
She
turns towards Graham, Yasmin and Ryan.
The Doctor smiles.
The Doctor: Could be fun.
Graham: But you.. you’re
alone.
Ryan: You might need help.
Yasmin: We’re coming with
you.
The
Doctor smiles.
The Doctor: Oh, brilliant!
_______________________________________________
And that is where I'm going to leave that. It will be interesting to see what professional writer person Chris Chibnall does with the real deal come this fall.
Thanks for indulging me. Until next time, remember to be good to one another.
_______________________________________________
And that is where I'm going to leave that. It will be interesting to see what professional writer person Chris Chibnall does with the real deal come this fall.
Thanks for indulging me. Until next time, remember to be good to one another.
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