Bob Hope is Chester Hooton and Bing Crosby is Duke Johnson,
a pair of vaudeville performers who barely stay a step ahead of the audiences they con out of their money and the police who want to arrest them.
In turn of the century San Francisco, their latest con has run it's course and they need to book it out of town. Chester wants to head east to New York City while Duke wants to go north to Alaska. With a modicum of deception and theft, Duke gets Chester stuck with on the steamer heading north.
Also looking to get out of town are a couple of thugs, McGurk and Sperry just a head of the law on a charge of murder, a heinous act that procured for the homicidal duo a map to a secret gold mine in Alaska.
Stuff 'n' junk happens as Chester and Duke get into an altercation with McGurk and Sperry, somehow win the fight, gets the map to the gold mine and assumes the identities (and beards) of McGurk and Sperry.
When is Dorothy Lamour going to show up in this picture?
Well...
Dorothy Lamour is Sal van Hoyden who is tracking down the missing map to the gold mine which has led her to a desolate town in Alaska and two men from that area, you guessed it, McGurk and Sperry.
Sal has entrusted dance hall owner Ace Larson with her mission to find the gold mine. Which is a mistake because he's got his own plans for the mine and they don't involve Sal.
Chester and Duke show up in town as "McGurk" and "Sperry" where they discover the whole town is scared of their alter egos. They ineptly play into their brutish bully personas to score free food and drinks.
Sal forces herself to flirt with and seduce first "McGurk" then "Sperry" to secure the map. Neither of these men can sustain the rough brutish personas they have assumed and Sal suspects something is up.
Then the real McGurk and Sperry show up, NOT in a good mood at all. They want that gold mine NOW!
Ace Larson is losing patience and wants that gold mine NOW!
And the chase is on!
There's an encounter with Santa Claus and in one scene, a mountain range is replaced with the Paramount Studios logo.
Since most of these "Road" movies take place in warmer climates and we get some scenes of Dorothy Lamour in a swimsuit, Road To Utopia serves up an hallucination when Chester sees Sal in a provocative one pierce bathing suit.
The bulk of the story is actually a flashback with the opening and closing acts featuring Bob, Bing and Dorothy in old age make up looking back on their misadventures in Alaska.
Road To Utopia is the one movie where Bob Hope's character gets the girl played by Dorothy Lamour as Chester and Sal are married in their golden years. Well, how much did Bob actually get the girl comes into question when they introduce old Duke to their son, played by a very young looking Bing Crosby.
Chester looks into the camera and says, "We adopted him."
Road To Utopia is the only "Road" picture without an actual geographic location in the title.
The movie was filmed from December 1943 to March 1944 but not released until 1946. One theory is that Paramount did not want the silliness of Road To Utopia to jeopardize Bing Crosby's chances at a Best Actor Oscar for his role in the drama Going My Way. (For which Crosby did win an Oscar.)
Road To Utopia also had a narrator in the form of humor essayist Robert Benchley providing wry commentary that is interspersed throughout the movie. I personally found the commentary unnecessary and added nothing to the film.
In 1947, Road to Utopia received an Academy Award nomination for Best Original Screenplay.
Road to Utopia was a big success both at the box office and with critics.
The New York Times: "Not since Charlie Chaplin was prospecting for gold in a Hollywood-made Alaska many long years ago has so much howling humor been swirled with so much artificial snow as it is in Road to Utopia which came to the Paramount yesterday."
Variety: "The highly successful Crosby-Hope-Lamour “Road” series under the Paramount banner comes to attention once again in Road to Utopia a zany laugh-getter which digresses somewhat from pattern by gently kidding the picture business and throwing in unique little touches, all with a view to tickling the risibilities."
Let me check in with the I’m So Glad My Suffering Amuses You writing intern. Were your risibilities tickled by Road To Utopia?
 |
"M... m... my r... risi.... risibilities are t... too
fr... fr...frozen to... to b... be t... t... tickled."
"You're no fun, you know that?"
"S... sorry to disappoint. C...c... can we h... have
another l... l... log on the f... fire?"
"Again with the LOG! Your focus should be on the BLOG!" |
What am I doing with an intern anyway?
Road to Utopia hews close to the Hope/Crosby "Road" picture formula but with enough variations to keep the concept fresh and interesting. It is packed with a bevy of jokes, non sequitors and fourth wall breaking insanity we've come to expect from Bob Hope and Bing Crosby when they're on the road to somewhere.
Er, how do you dispose of a frozen intern? Not for me, asking for a friend. You know, in case that topic of conversation should come up.
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