Saturday, May 14, 2016

Saturday Catch Up

Hi there! Welcome to I'm So Glad My Suffering Amuses You, now made with whole grain oats. I'm Dave-El and I've got one hand in my pocket and the other one is in my other pocket because I just can't be bothered, you know?

Last Saturday was Free Comic Book Day and believe it or not, as I write this, I have not finished reading all the comics I got for free as well as paid for. Hopefully I will find some chill time this weekend to finish that stack.

In a post Free Comic Book Day landscape, I dedicated this blog to Comic Book Theme Week for posts made over the previous 5 days. But stuff, as stuff will do, kept happening out there in the real world.

It appears that there's still a US Presidential election thingy going on. The Democrats are in a tizzy because they think Hillary Clinton should be able to focus her attention on the general election but Bernie Sanders won't shut the fuck up! Hey, Bernie! It was a good schtick at the start but now you're just acting more like an ornery old man. Which, I realize, is not really a fair assessment as you really are an ornery old man. The thing is Hillary is out there plastering a smile on her face but you know there's a blood vessel throbbing behind her left eye that's gonna burst if Bernie doesn't stop talking shit about Hillary and just sit his scrawny white ass down.

Meanwhile and elsewhere, is the Republican Party actually getting their shit together? Behind Donald Trump? Could it be true? Granted there are some hold outs like both former Presidents Bush and 2012 GOP nominee Mitt Romney; they will abso-fucking-lutely no damn way, no damn how support Trump. And there's still talk of floating an independent candidate. But all of this means shit in a world where all the #NeverTrump, #StopTrump and #FuckYouTrump movements never caught on. 

No, Republican Party, your nominee for the Presidential election is Donald Trump. And somewhere, a Republican shakily grasps a glass of bourbon and ponders what fate has brought to the GOP:

"So Donald Trump is... our nominee. And that's... OK. I mean, it won't be...that bad. It might even be... a good thing, right? Maybe? Oh God!"

Our lonely Republican gulps down his bourbon and slumps into his chair, sobbing.  

Over in Brazil, the Senate there is working to get rid of their President, Dilma Rousseff. The Senate voted to begin impeachment proceedings and suspend her from office during those proceedings. We should take notes on how Brazil is handling this. It might be helpful in a few years with President Trump. 

This past week, it was revealed that ISIS or ISIL or the Islamic State or Those Evil Dickless Bastards dealt with 45 of their fighters fleeing from a battle by... burying them alive. Oh shit! I'm sure that's got to be against the rules in the employee handbook. In all seriousness, with all the political games going on over here in America, its still galling to note that Those Evil Dickless Bastards are still a blight on the face of the Earth.

Looking away from Earth and into OUTER SPACE, the planet Mercury orbital path took it over the sun for most of the world to see. Which was embarrassing for Mercury as it wasn't wearing any pants at the time.  

Back on Earth, the Panama Papers have continued to not make news. The revelation in these papers that a bunch of ridiculously wealthy people are holding their money in tax defying off shore accounts should tick off people but we're either too ambivalent or too tired to care. The rich are getting richer? Wow. You can knock me over from that surprise. Actually, one interesting name popped this week in the Panama Papers: Emma Watson. Yes, that Emma Watson, otherwise known as Hermione Grainger from Harry Potter. Taxista Avoidiosa!

German Justice Minister Heiko Maas is proposing legislation to annul homosexuality convictions  resulting from a19th-century law outlawed sexual relations between men. (That law was rescinded in 1994.) Meanwhile, the Italian Parliament approved legislation recognizing civil unions of same-sex couples.

Speaking of same sex unions, a U.S. federal District Judge blocked the $6.3 billion merger of major office supply companies Staples and Office Depot, finding it would result in reduced competition and higher prices. Both companies backed off the deal, vowing to continue charging too much for stuff on their own.

Finally, I have to end this post on some sad news. It was announced last week that a new British scientific naval vessel will NOT be named Boaty McBoatface after all, despite the overwhelming support for that name from online supporters. This marks a double blow, against the forces of democracy and the against the forces of the internet doing stupid shit.

OK, that's enough for today. Tomorrow's post is Episode Three of my Doctor Who fan fiction. Until next time, remember to be good to one another.

Yours truly,
Bloggy McBloggerface.

Doctor Who: The Dalek Planet - Episode Four

DISCLAIMER:  I'm doing this for fun, not profit. This is not officially sanctioned by the BBC and the producers of Doctor Who.   In c...