Wednesday, February 3, 2016

Oddball Super Heroes: Stone Boy

Hi there! Welcome to I'm So Glad My Suffering Amuses You, which is a blog, not a zumba class. I'm Dave-El and I have no idea how much that doggie is in the window. 

Last Wednesday, I kicked off a series of posts on the subject of "oddball super heroes". For the first few weeks of this series, I want to focus on the 1960s Legion of Super Heroes. When you're a super hero team with the word "legion" in your name, you've got to have a lot of super heroes and when you have that many super heroes, there are bound to be some powers that are going to look pretty stupid. 

 But even with the mandate of filling out the ranks to make the Legion of Super Heroes an actual Legion, there are super heroes who would not make the cut.  

For example, Stone Boy.  






Stone Boy was born Dag Wentim on the planet Zwen whose inhabitants can petrify their bodies, putting themselves into suspended animation for their planet's six-month-long nights. 

For whatever reason, Dag's hair is not affected by the transformation. 

Now you might think having a body with the density of stone would be kind of cool with its inherent strength and resistance to harm. Except Dag Wentim's body does not take on the attributes of stone. 

He becomes stone.  

While Stone Boy is in his petrified form, he cannot move. Basically, Stone Boy has the power to remain motionless for an incredibly long time.  Stone Boy was denied admission to the Legion of Super Heroes because his power was considered "too static". 

Thankfully, Stone Boy got to fulfill his super hero dream by signing up with the Legion of Substitute Heroes.  

No, I'm not making that up. Yes, the Legion of Substitute Heroes is an actual thing. 

Still, Stone Boy's very literal power to become a boy made out of stone has a few drawbacks.  On one Legion of Substitute Heroes adventure,  Stone Boy is stuck in the ground for most of the story after being dropped from a great height.

There have been later attempts to redeem Stone Boy by giving him the ability to transform parts of his body into stone (such as his fist, you pervert) or to be able to move while in stone form. These developments may have made Stone Boy less stupid but they made him less unique.  

By the way, Stone Boy's rallying cry? "I'm ready to ROCK!"

OK, I made that part up. Sorry.  

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Next Wednesday, another 30th century hero does not make the grade and winds up with the Legion of Substitute Heroes. But maybe even the subs don't want them there. 

In the meantime, another post on some other thing is coming up tomorrow. Until then, be good to one another.  


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