Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Our House Guest, the Dark Specter of Death

We're about 2/3 of the way through October which means we've only got about 65 shopping days left until Christmas!!!

Oh yeah, and Halloween. That's coming too.

My daughter Miranda is begging me to put up the death specter that haunts our home by the front door, with it's black ragged cloak draped over an eerie skeletal form which sends fear shivering down the spine with its wicked laugh and its glowing rainbow teeth. 

Rainbow teeth? OK, that pulls back on the scary quotient a bit. Maybe that's why my father in law was able to pick it up for 85% off the retail price at an after Halloween sale back in 2012. It's great when a grandfather wants to do fun stuff for his granddaughter except his granddaughter is my daughter and I had to find somewhere to store the %$#@!ing box it came in. 

So Miranda chomped at the bit for 10 months to put up our scary skeleton guy.

"Can we put up the skeleton?" "No, it's Valentine's Day." 

"Can we put up the skeleton?" "No, it's Easter." 

"Can we put up the skeleton?" "No, it's the 4th of July." 

"Can we put up the skeleton?" "No, it's Arbor Day." 

"Can we put up the skeleton?" "No, it's...oh hell, it's Halloween." 

So Miranda assumed the role of Dr. Frankenstein and I was her humble Igor as we assembled the parts of the skeleton into its dark cloaked whole and we pondered our creation to which we had...

(Oops! Forgot to plug it in.) 

To which we had given LIFE! 

This fearsome specter of the netherworld, born of bone and clad in shadow, it's teeth glowing like a rainbow. 

I called him Steve. 

My daughter calls him Skeletor. I told her that name was already taken by He-Man's arch nemesis but she won't hear of it. Actually she can't hear of it over her laughter everytime I try to explain "He-Man" to her. 

Somewhat artistically altered representation of
Steve, the Dark Specter of Death,
serving up what appears to be a taco salad.
A taco salad..of DOOM! 

So last Halloween was Steve's...er, Skeletor's big debut and I was a bit nervous. I was concerned that the particularly young trick or treaters would be scared of our cackling door attendant. But no, not really. One little girl dressed as a princess marched right up to Steve and said, "I'm not scared of you!" 

It's the rainbow teeth. 

Don't be a ghoul. Be good to one another.

I'm So Glad My Suffering Amuses You

Where The !@##$% Is Doctor Who?!?!?

Yeah, that's what I would like to know!   Look, I thought the info was solid, that after England's first game in the 2018 Wo...