Rejected Peanuts Specials

Hi there! I'm Dave-El and welcome to I'm So Glad My Suffering Amuses You, the blog that is completely 100% sincere. 

OK, 90% sincere. 

Never less than 75% sincere. 

Maybe 60% sincere sometimes.

All right, I'm drawing the line at 50%. This blog is never less than 50% sincere. 

Maybe once in a while, it's only 35% sincere.  

But never less than 20%. 

Hi there! I'm Dave-El and welcome to I'm So Glad My Suffering Amuses You, the most damn insincere blog on the internet! 

As Halloween is coming 'round tomorrow and tonight, to get everyone in the spirit of things, ABC is running that classic Halloween special, It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. 

While the Christmas special was the first and still best of the Peanuts cartoons on TV, I think It's the Great Pumpkin ranks a very, very close second. 

• Charlie Brown sucks at getting treats. ("I got a rock.") 
• Snoopy becomes the Red Baron and flies into battle with his Sopwith Camel, then he has to struggle to get back home through enemy territory. Who knew World War I could be so much fun?
• Lucy and the girls use the back of Charlie Brown's head to design a Jack O' Lantern.
• Charlie's sister Sally throws herself at her "sweet baboo", Linus. 

And then there's Linus, the poor bastard. He is determined that THIS Halloween he is going to see the Great Pumpkin who visits only the most sincere of pumpkin patches. Linus is convinced the patch he is in is the most sincere of all pumpkin patches.

There's actually a sweet scene near the end where mean old Lucy Van Pelt actually shows compassion for her lunkhead brother. And Linus is not daunted, no siree. He's going to find an even MORE sincere pumpkin patch next year and he WILL see the Great Pumpkin, yes he will.  

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The other night on Twitter, #RejectedPeanutsSpecials began to trend so I jumped on with a few ideas for Peanuts specials that TV network might be wise to pass on. 

Here we go!

• Does This Look Infected To You, Charlie Brown?
• You Will Never Know Love, Charlie Brown
• You Will Never Get Out Of Here Alive, Charlie Brown
• Your Call Is Very Important To Us, Charlie Brown
• Get the F**k Off Twitter, Charlie Brown!
• You're Bleeding From the Eyes, Charlie Brown
• Mama Said Knock You Out, Charlie Brown
• OH MY GOD, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, CHARLIE BROWN?!?!?
• I Wasn't Expecting the Spanish Inquisition, Charlie Brown

And finally, the most popular one I posted which received several favorites and retweets:  

• You Can't Have Any Pudding If You Don't Eat Your Meat, Charlie Brown

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I hope you enjoy the Peanuts Halloween special tonight and I hope Halloween itself goes well for you tomorrow. I hope your bags and buckets are filled with the best candy and absolutely no rocks. 

Unless you're a rock collector or otherwise into rocks. 

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Friday: I'll be busy with various Halloween activities tomorrow (for real!) so bROkEN nEWs will be a Best Of... Edition. (Talk about scary!) 

Saturday and Sunday: A double shot of Doctor Who Weekend including a review of this week's new episode, Dark Water, part 1 of the Series 8 finale.

Until then, be good to one another.