Thursday, May 24, 2018

Trump Cancels His Date With Kim Jong Un


Li’l Donald Trump, perpetually in a petulant snit, canceled his June 12 summit with North Korean leader Kim Jong Un after Kim said mean, nasty things, that ol’ nasty meanie!

 

“Sadly, based on the tremendous anger and open hostility displayed in your most recent statement, I feel it is inappropriate, at this time, to have this long-planned meeting,” Trump wrote in a letter to Kim, sent to reporters on Thursday.

 

No, the letter was not written in crayon so color me surprised. 

 

Yep, Kim was back in a belligerent mode of late but that appears to be in direct response to comments made by national security adviser John Bolton.  

 

You see, Bolton is an extreme hardliner who thinks “shoot first, ask questions later” is too lenient. Bolton is more of a “shoot first, I don’t have any questions” kind of a guy.

 

Bolton recently made the rounds on news shows promoting the idea that engagement with North Korea would follow the Libya model. 

 

What, pray tell, is the Libya model, you may ask?

 

After Libyan dictator Muammar Gaddafi gave up his nuclear weapons program in 2003, an armed revolution aided by a U.S. and NATO military intervention ousted him in 2011. Rebel forces captured Gaddafi, sodomized him with gardening tools and brutally killed him. I’m sure along one of those steps (capture, sodomize or kill), Gaddafi was probably thinking, “Gee, I bet this would NOT be happening if I still had my nuclear weapons program.”

 

I imagine hearing John Bolton go “oh, we would like to follow a Libya model” made Kim Jong Un think, “What? And get captured, sodomized with gardening tools AND brutally killed? Oh fuck you, John Bolton!” Then just to be on the safe side, Kim Jong Un ordered all hoes and pruning shears to be removed from North Korea. 

 

The thing is, the “Libya model” represents the person with the nuclear weapons program completely giving up the nuclear weapons program in exchange for the rest of the world leaving their ass alone. That didn’t happen in Libya. Now that’s not to say Muammar Gaddafi didn’t have it coming. Gaddafi was a genocidal madman who is currently in his own corner of hell being sodomized with gardening tools.

 

Kim Jong Un himself is not a nice guy. He has a lot of blood on his hands too. If John Bolton’s reference to the “Libya model” wasn't a tacit enough threat to Kim Jong Un, Kim only needs to look to a more recent example to give him pause: Li’l Donnie’s violation of the Iran nuclear deal. 

 

Iran agreed to give up its nuclear weapons program in exchange for relief from crippling economic sanctions. Weapon inspectors and various intelligence agencies have concurred: Iran has done it’s part. 

 

Trump said, “Fuck that! I just KNOW Iran has to be violating the deal so, hold on, bitches, I’m laying down the worst economic sanctions on your asses.” 

 

Kim Jong Un may be short and has trouble seeing over the tops of things but he can hear clearly the message: North Korea has to give up its nuclear weapons program in exchange for… nothing. No, just because America says so.

 

So where is Kim Jong Un’s incentive to behave, to cooperate, to negotiate?   

 

Of course, there is the possibility this was the plan all along. The word was that Trump doing fuck all by way of preparation for the summit with Kim Jong Un. He let himself get suckered into accepting Kim Jong Un’s invitation to meet up because Li’l Donnie’s anxious to show he’s a big boy. Trump brings on John Bolton who is not a big believer in negotiating with North Korea in the first damn place. Bolton spouts some shit about the Libya model which is sure to get under Kim Jong Un’s skin, causing Kim Jong Un to get a bit testy which gives Trump cover to get out of a meeting he didn’t want to go to anyway.  

 

In a surprise to no one:  

 

South Korean President Moon Jae-in and his government appeared to be blindsided by Trump’s decision Thursday. “(We) are trying to figure out what President Trump’s intention is and the exact meaning of it.”  

 

Translation: “What the fuck is this moron up to now?” 

President Moon, if you figure this out, let us know, OK? 

 

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