Welcome to I'm So Glad My Suffering Amuses You, the blog that makes you question your reason for living.
Dave-El here and it's Friday night! Every Friday, we do a weakly...er, weekly round up of the news and make fun of it in a little feature we call....BROKEN NEWS. Today's installment is brought to you by Zimmerman Hoodies! The latest fashion trend for black men who don't want to get shot by George Zimmerman!
Tonight we have a special guest: the former New York City district attorney and New York governor who had to take that long walk of shame after being caught playing Yahtzee with a prostitute*, Eliot Spitzer. After doing time in the wilderness of penance (hosting a show on CNN), he's back in politics, running to be elected as NYC Dog Catcher...er, NYC Comptroller. (What does that mean? He'll trolls for comps? How the hell should I know?)
*"Playing Yahtzee with a prostitute" is my euphemism for "screwing a whore".
Anyway, Mr. Spitzer, is there anything you want to say to our readers tonight?
Is Eliot all right? He's looking more
more freaky every minute!
OK, back to the headlines....
**Zimmerman Hoodies cannot guarantee George Zimmerman will NOT shoot you.