Sunday, July 28, 2013

What the Hell Do I Do Now?


Seriously....

What the hell do I do now?


Well, you heard the man!
He doesn't care!
So I'm going to....

 Arm anteaters with machetes, boil cabbages in Ryan Seacrest's hot tub, crash my car into a bridge and I won't care, deliver pizzas to Chinese restaurants, eat my weight in Cinnamon Toast Crunch, fondle myself without my permission, gather curds (but not whey), have a wonderful Christmas time, incinerate all copies of "Having a Wonderful Christmas Time", joust with a pelican, mambo with Mariah Carey (or Drew Carey, I'm not picky), nibble on corn (or Drew Carey), pick a pair of pickled peppers, quarrel with Zachary Quinto, really try to not think about salamanders, salamanders (dammit!), think about salamanders anyway (I feel so dirty), underestimate the power of Pine Sol, vary my routine in order to elude the anteaters armed with machetes, wonder if the cabbages in Ryan Seacrest's hot tub are sufficient boiled, X-ray a set of X-Rays and see if I can go back in time so I can add whey to my curds after all, yodel at the jousting pelican and zip up this body bag before the cops pull me over.

I can do whatever the hell I want because that guy DOESN'T CARE!

Thank you!


 

No comments:

Post a Comment

The Not So Incredible Edible

This past weekend was a strange one here at the Fortress of Ineptitude.   Well, “strange” was in the mission statement for Saturday evening ...