Monday, December 23, 2013

Rock 'n' Roll All Night, Run a Restaurant Every Day

Hello! Thank you for coming to I'm So Glad My Suffering Amuses You!

Have you been to this blog before?

You have?

And you came back? Really?

Ahem! I mean, it's so wonderful to have you back. How many are in your party? OK, right this way.

My name is Dave-El and our special today is Re-Fried Twitter Posts. Oh, you'll love it. We pick only the most succulent of Tweets and place them here in the blog to marinate until they are suffused with a delightful flavor.

These tweets were grown in a Trending Twitter Topic known as...    


Here are some of the selections available on the menu.     
Simply Red Lobster

This particular dish combines the soulful sounds of the 1980s pop group Simply Red with the lovely dining experience of Red Lobster. Sadly, you may be "Holding Back the Tears" if the owners are successful in selling the Red Lobster franchise. We are exploring options to combine Simply Red with Red Robin. (Yum!)

Hootie & the Blowfish Grille 
This particular pairing is for the particular taste for those who do not find Hootie & the Blowfish overrated or do not think those radio spots for Bonefish Grille are pretentious as hell.      
Golden Earring Corral

Fair warning that the Golden Corral buffet can be like falling into the Twilight Zone sung about by Golden Earring. Remember, "All You Can Eat" is a blessing, not a challenge.

Olive Soundgarden 

This is a rather obvious pairing of Soundgarden with Olive Garden but it has its own particular delights; for example, the never ending salad and breadsticks. And...did we mention the never ending salad and breadsticks?

The Mamas and the Papas John's

This mash-up of 60's folk band The Mamas and the Papas with pizza delivery chain Papa John's was a Twitter favorite in that someone actually re-tweeted it. Go figure.

Burger Kings of Leon

This is the most plausible team up of food and music. Seriously,  I could see the Kings of Leon paired up with Burger King. Hey, this is in writing here, guys! If I see this happening, I will expect a small but reasonable profit participation. 

International Crowded House of Pancakes

Don't dream this list is over as we bring in another band from the 1980s, Crowded House, and match them up with the International House of Pancakes. Yep, all over the world there are tables with a corporate mandated uniformity of syrup induced stickiness. Maybe new partners Crowded House can do something about that.

And finally...


That's right, the greatest pop group that ever existed in the history of the known universe, the Swedish super stars known collectively as ABBA in tandem with the number one a chain restaurant in the USA, Applebees. This is my personal favorite item on the menu! 

Thank you once more for coming to visit us here at I'm So Glad My Suffering Amuses You! Remember, when you're here, you're family. So get off your lazy ass, family, and go wash some dishes!

Tomorrow....The first ever I'm So Glad My Suffering Amuses You Christmas Blog Spectacular!
Wednesday AND Thursday...a special TWO day event as we await then review the Doctor Who Christmas special, The Time of the Doctor. We expect excitement and sadness in equal measure as we say farewell to the 11th Doctor, Matt Smith.
Friday...a special edition of Broken News! (And by "special", I mean "I'm on Christmas break and I'm too lazy to come up with all new material.")
And more blog posts that will make you say, "Yep, that's a blog post all right."
Until then, be good to one another.

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