Wednesday, April 10, 2013

SEX! SEX! It's a blog about SEX!! (Kinda. Sorta. Maybe)


If you're new here because you Googled "SEX" and some link brought you to this blog, sorry. It may not be what you were expecting. Yes, the title of this blog is I'm So Glad My Suffering Amuses You but it's not an S&M site. (Not yet, anyway.) However, I will assure you, this blog will turn its attention to SEX before the end of today's post.

It's tough coming up with material every day for all my readers. But I feel an obligation to make sure there's something here at I'm So Glad My Suffering Amuses You to entertain my audience of:

  • Internet scanning robots

  • A special FBI task force who mistakenly think I'm a terrorist named Daveek El-Fadid and that the #HuffPostHop is some kind of coded message system to my fellow terrorists.

  • A reader in Kansas City who keeps asking where he can send his $5.00 for anti-whippersnapper insurance from American Glory.

  • A group of editors at DC Comics who are waiting for a 2nd edition of Really Bad Comics because, well, ideas, you know.

  • A female stalker in Oregon who I think may be a serial killer but I may be just desperate enough to take my chances. I'm thinking it over.

  • An all-gay men's soccer team in Barcelona.

Yep, that is a strange and possibly very disturbing group but I would hate to lose any of them, even the FBI Task Force*.

*Oh, let me prime that pump today: *ahem* Death to America. You know, whatever. They can use that to get more funding to keep spying on my blog.

So what do I have for my adoring fans today? Hopefully, something useful.

Ten Things to Say After SEX!

These are very helpful, particularly if you want to have SEX with different people and not THAT person again.

1) "TAXI!"

2) "Thank you. May I be excused?"

3) "You can take the paper bag off your head now."

4) "BINGO!"

5) "I did not know that was detachable."

6) "That tingling means it's working!"

7) "I just need you to sign a few forms."

8) "You were fantastic, er, uh, you...person you."

9) "No, wait! Do over! DO OVER!"


They love that last one in Barcelona.

OK, that's all I've got for today. Thanks for dropping by.

To the internet scanning robots: 10011001110101111! (LOL)

Oh, before I forget: Oregon lady, remember to take your

meds and yes, I'm REALLY thinking it over.

Sometimes I lurk around the dark alleys of Twitter at, just waiting for my moment...TO STRIKE! Yes, I will attempt to awkwardly interject myself in your Twitter conversations because we're all pals, right?

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