The Huff Post Hop for Friday, April 26, 2013

From Dave-El's Twitter, it's the #HuffPostHop brought to you by Summer's Eve Sparkplugs! Let your engine roar with Summers Eve! Now: DAVE-EL!

Thank you! Welcome to the #HuffPostHop where I take #Headlines from @HuffingtonPost & make up funny stuff! So let's go in 5...4...3...2...

#HuffPostHop “Congress Bails Out Air Travelers – And No One Else” Well, no one else was holding up Congress’ flights to the Cayman Islands!

#HuffPostHop “White House: Syria Chemical Weapons Evidence Not 'Airtight'” Dick Cheney: "Facts, schmacts! The White House is being picky!"

#HuffPostHop “Google: Government Snooping Just Hit Record Levels” Well, I for one LOVE our benevolent government overlords!"

#HuffPostHop “Retailers Rejected New Safety Plan Before Deadly Factory Collapse” It would be a REAL dick move to reject it afterwards

 

#HuffPostHop “Evangelical Leader Compares Nagging Wives To Torture” We’re not supposed to agree with that, are we? NOT that we would, NO!"

 

#HuffPostHop “Rove:George W Bush Just Slightly Less Great Than Lincoln” (Too many jokes, too little space; Insert joke involving ham later.)

 

#HuffPostHop "Gwyneth Paltrow Shares WAY Too Much About Her Nether Regions" Her dress is sheer, you can see her Pepper Potts.

 

And...#HuffPostHop “Amanda Bynes Shaves Her Head” Lindsay Lohan is pissed! “Shit! I’m falling behind! Scissors!" she yelled to no one there.

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Dave-El is also on Twitter at https://twitter.com/DayWayLo